Might not be fair to our pals at Heartland Poker Tour — or even the people we don’t know running low buy-in events across multiple US states — to allow WSOP schedules to determine when the sun does not rise on the Gregorian poker calendar as if all players were Chinese Hebrews … but hey, that’s how it works in poker. As much as the nation of Pokerstarzistan might want to go to war to establish their EPT/UKIPT-APPT/ANZPT-NAPT/LAPT(?) clock as the new global standard … the World Series of Poker still sets the international norm for how poker people are supposed to plan/keep track of our lives.

With that said, there are two more events at WSOP-NOLA this week … the ladies event and a seniors event … but leading up to those, WSOP clerics have released official “semi-final” statistics for the 2009-2010 WSOP-Circuit season … which awarded more than $20 million in prize money and 150 gold rings across 11 stops held in Hammond, Indiana (Chicago), Southern Indiana, Lake Tahoe, Atlantic City, Tunica, Council Bluffs, Caesars Atlantic City, San Diego (Rincon), St. Louis, Las Vegas, and New Orleans.

For those interested, that accounts for about 1/10 of overall WSOP prize money and more than 2/3 of annual WSOP hardware awarded. Seems Mark “Pegasus” from Georgetown, KY, took down the lion’s share for an unofficial title as Minor League Player of the Year.

Click below for rankings for the 2009-2010 season that came from all that:

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World Team Poker is the next “big event” in Las Vegas … gets underway at the Golden Nugget with a party tonight (of course) and cards in the air on Wednesday. The WTP will be the third big-dollar, made-for-TV attempt to bring team poker to Las Vegas (fourth if you include one that was canceled the weekend of) … and like all the rest, as the WTP teams came together, the usual on-camera stars lined up to get their airtime register. We can tell there is a definitive desire for team poker somewhere — why else would the pros keep showing up? — and everyone who ever plays in these events reports having an absolute blast. But for some reason or another, they often tend to falter.

Will the WTP be a matter of someone finally getting it right, or is there something inherent to the game itself that makes team tournament poker a concept that just can’t stick?

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Wuh-oh, Dr. Pauly seems to be in the middle of a flashback … hang in there, bud, it’s OK. Drink some water and just find your happy place … remember, that tree doesn’t really want to eat you … because it’s a good tree.

Over on Tao of Poker, Pauly’s posted the complete Tao of Pokerati archives from the 2009 WSOP. Worth a listen without a doubt. I’m always amazed when checking traffic stats to see how much these short, 2-4 minute episodes continue to suck bandwidth play in reruns.

I know that other show I’m on is “award winning” and was named the “Top Poker Podcast” of 2009 in the Bluff Magazine Reader’s Choice Awards … and I love The Poker Beat, for sure. But Tao of Pokerati is different — and it’s more than just my little Porno for Pyros kinda side project.

Can’t really explain … but it’s way less slick, way more unplugged and unfiltered, and imho brings a whole new perspective to the summertime festivities as two seasoned, hardened WSOP vets give their instantaneous perspectives on what they are witnessing at the moment. And considering all the unforeseeable possibilities the 2010 WSOP promises to bring … well I just can’t imagine a better way for the cube-dwellers out there to understand what is really going on at the Rio.

Again, click on over to the Tao side of the equation to get your pre-WSOP juices flowing.

UPDATE: Oh right, and Benjo, too.

Yikes, didn’t realize I would need a pen for taking notes … But apparently word is leaking back to CardRunners headquarters in Chicago that I am struggling a bit in PLO. I thought I was getting it all, until I saw this video, actually, and learned just how much I don’t know. My friends at CR want me to work with LFTV on better reading the texture of boards and thus interpreting what opponents’ actions mean on all variety of flops.

LFTV, btw, is short for “learned from TV.” He’s apparently their resident expert in Pot-Limit Omaha education … at least for pre-flop play and subsequent decisions after you see the first three community cards. I can tell he’s a good teacher. But oy, so many numbers … maybe I belong in the remedial class?

Blow up the screen and try to follow along. You, of course, can get even more full-length CardRunners video lessons with TrulyFreePokerTraining.com.

Fugk! I know I shouldn’t bemoan someone else’s success, but I just read about Steve Lipscomb and Lyle Berman’s new venture, an energy company called Voyager Oil & Gas. (Seventh item down.)

Back in November, when I first learned about the WPT’s imminent sale to PartyGaming, I bought up as much WPTE stock as I could, assuming it would blow up, or at least be converted to Party stock in a highly profitable way. Much to my disappointment, when the new shares showed up in my online account, they were for Lipscomb’s new company, Ante4, which had no plans just a bunch of cash. They were trading at less than a dollar a share.

Believing I had seen this repeatedly while chasing penny tech stocks in the late ’90s — almost always these companies available on the cheap gave me hope briefly before descending on an asymptotic curve towards zero — I quickly sold all I had just bought of ANTF and dumped it into PRTY.L. If only someone had told me to hold on to it! Now, just six months later, the new Lipscomb-Berman joint that I got (and got rid of) at 90something cents is trading at $3.44, for a YTD increase of 222 percent.

Why do I think for all the grief I’ve given Steve Lipscomb over the years, he’s sitting in a very happy place right now, laughing … at me?

Seriously, I can’t believe they let people gamble this way on the internet! But it’s just so hard not to with those cute baby ads making it seem like any kid with access to a computer and a credit card can do it!

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Sorry for missing this, but I guess I hit the Google snooze alarm. Ten days ago, federal authorities arrested Todd Lyons, 36, of Beverly, Massachusetts, for allegedly running an offshore sports betting operation called Sports Offshore. They pretty much threw the book at him, levying 36 criminal charges — fraud, money laundering, racketeering, tax crimes, you name it … and one of them for violating the UiGEA.

Nothing to do with poker specifically at first glance … but if you believe the Feds don’t operate in a vacuum, there seems to be a message here that might-should have a few Poker After Dark regulars shitting bricks taking note …

I learned about the arrest from J. Todd, whom I find myself paying closer attention to than before as the June 1 D-Day approaches. However, point of order, dude, I think you got it wrong saying Lyons was the first ever UIGEA arrest. I’m 99.99 percent sure he was the second. You gotta read your Pokerati, man, where you’ll see that the first was Daniel Tzvetkoff. It’s right there, charge #4, in the criminal complaint from the DOJ! Reason magazine saw the same thing, too.

With that out of the way (we understand typos here), let’s look a little closer at this case and how it may or may not be different from payment processor arrests related to online poker …

First off, this indictment does not come out of the Southern District of New York, which we know is where the biggest poker heat has been coming from. However, is it just a coincidence that the first UIGEA arrest happened in Las Vegas (capital of the poker world) and the second was in Massachusetts (home to the biggest Congressional opponent of the UIGEA). The message someone could read here is “Barney Frank can’t save you!”

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I’ve been a fan of John Stossel, and his willingness to call bullshit on conventional wisdom, since the days I started noticing the difference between good journalism and bad. He has since moved from ABC News to Fox, where his libertarian shtick is a tea-party-friendly line of fiscal conservatism that challenges the moral contingent who want to impose on personal freedoms. Thus, the newest cause he’s taken up (at least for a week) is gambling … specifically online gambling.

Stossel outs himself as a recreational poker player in an episode of his namesake show on Fox Business that aired Thursday: Bans on Betting.

The show re-aired throughout the weekend, and will be on one more time tonight, Sunday, at 10 PM ET.

His efforts to bring the online gambling issue to the fore last week extended far beyond his own show. Here he is on The O’Reilly Factor:

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It’s not often a WSOP Circuit event catches our eye, particularly when the final table is fighting for the lion’s share of a $20k prizepool. But Event #10 in New Orleans, the last Circuit stop of the 09/10 poker year, was special, as Daphne “Tweety” Turner beat Allen Kessler to win the $300+40 Mixed Games event.

It was a $6,700 score. But more notably about her NOLA victory:

1. She becomes the first woman to win two circuit rings. (Watch out Dwyte Pilgrim.)

2. She’s from Texas; Richmond to be exact, a big town in the sticks just outside of Houston. (Go Texas!)

3. She beat @AllenKessler heads-up; with all due respect to the Chainsaw, seeing
our favorite Vegas nit finish second makes “Tweety’s” victory even better. (Wonder if she got that nickname before or after the creation of Twitter.)

4. The event she won was a 7-game mix, or as I like to think of it as of today, HORSE+Pokerati … or the Pokerati Game+HORSE. (No-Limit Hold’em and PLO are the two added games.)

Here’s Turner’s interview after her win … the first woman to win two circuit events … and someone you might wanna be a little careful of should you see her at your table:

Online gambling+poker payment processor Douglas Rennick had to sign over his property on Tuesday, in accordance with his recent guilty plea in US Federal Court. That, of course, has the Southern District of New York now batting 1.000 when it comes to getting convictions or guilty pleas in online gambling cases.

The amount Rennick admitted was involved in the illegal “gambling conspiracy” he was part of totaled $583 million. But as part of his plea agreement — reducing his threatened sentence from 30 years to 6-to-12 months — the amount he actually signed over (thereby contributing to national debt reduction, obv) was about $17 million. I think that was just about everything he had on him. The Feds are still seeking that extra half-billion, and expect Rennick to help them find it before he gets officially sentenced in September.

Check it out … here’s the actual forfeiture order
.
The crime the Canadian payment processor pled to (one count) was a Wire Act violation. Generally we poker people have thought of the Wire Act as being more about sports betting. But in Rennick’s case, court documents made it clear — specifically in an sworn affidavit from an FBI agent — that this money came from Full Tilt and/or PokerStars.

By law, the Feds have 30 days to post the details of his seized accounts at www.forfeiture.gov. Then, you’ll have 60 days to file a claim if you think any of that money might belong to you. Any takers?

Big ups to @GamingCounsel for helping me understand the difference between “forfeiture allegation” and “subject property” in 140 characters or less. [thx!]

Check it out … from Forbes magazine:

Online Poker War Heats Up
The Department of Justice bags a Canadian payment processor in its fight against online poker. Are the big online firms next?

Interesting … these biz-media guys may not really get poker, but they do listen to The Poker Beat presumably understand a thing or two about multi-national finance and how putting rich white guys behind bars can be good for traffic circulation.

Generally, the poker world has always celebrated when the big online companies always got some mainstream media attention. But who knew there could even be a story without a press release from Full Tilt or PokerStars?

This shirt is technically inaccurate now in Washington State but still would make for a great rally souvenir.

I saw a horrifyingly disturbing video several weeks ago. In it, this dude is getting fucked by a horse … I know I know … not even gonna link to it. (Forget NSFW, this is NSFHumanity, let alone lunch; trust me, you don’t even wanna google “2 guys 1 horse” … unless you happen to enjoy YouTube reaction vids to interspecies snuff films that show a man dying after literally getting ripped a new one by a 900-pound equine lover.)

Crazy thing is, this Darwin Awards ceremony took place on a farm in Washington State, which apparently has some of the most lax laws anywhere against bestiality — in fact no laws, and thus no charges were pressed against the men who ran an underground bordello for zoophiles. (Seattle Times, fyi, safe to click)

A little stomach-wrenching legal perspective as the Supreme Court in Olympia prepares to consider the felonious nature of the very toughest state law anywhere against online poker. Later this month, the court will be taking up the 2007 case of Lee Rousso vs. State of Washington, where an online poker player challenges the constitutionality of Washington’s 2006 Internet Gambling Ban.

Click here to read Rousso’s original complaint. He filed seeking a declaratory judgment on the legality of playing poker online, as opposed to other forms of online gambling that are specifically illegal (sports betting) or legal (horse racing and lottery). His primary beef seems to be that the IGB violates the federal Commerce Clause. He also calls out the questionable political backscratching between representatives and the casino industry that he claims was really behind this law that infringes on his liberty.

Heavy stuff in the balance …

As the court prepares to hear the case — not sure who won then lost, but these matters almost always require a suck and re-suck to get this far — the PPA is gathering a force to turn whatever happens on May 27 into a media event. Rousso, who happens to be the PPA’s Washington State Director, is set to testify, and cheering him on from the steps of the Supreme Court will be Al D’Amato, John Pappas, and Phil Gordon (the only Team Full Tilter who lives in Washington State). They hope to rally enough local PPA members to turn online poker issues into a noble courthouse spectacle.

Click below to read the PPA press release:

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Witht the June 1 enforcement deadline fast approaching, PPA Executive Director John Pappas lays out a new strategy for dodging the UIGEA:

They’re sending a petition around Congress requesting an exemption from the UIGEA for online poker and “peer-to-peer” games. Procedurally, this is similar to what got us that first six-month delay. And while it seems like a bit of a hail mary — starting off with just 22 signatures – if the PPA pulls this off it could be huge. Just guessing a bit here, but an exemption for poker, an ex post facto carveout essentially, seems like it would be a serious reversal of power akin to a middle pocket pair turning a set against an Ace-King that connected on the flop.

Haven’t spoken to anyone about this yet, but I think the big telltale sign here will be whether or not Harry Reid gets on board. He’s the guy other Dems (like my rep, Dina Titus, who recently signed on as a co-sponsor to the stalled Barney Frank bill) often look to for direction. Supposedly the rumors we’ve been spreading about his support for online gambling (and a possible poker-only bill) have been “greatly exaggerated”. And if you recall, his longtime big supporters at the American Gaming Association want more online gambling for sure, but only after this June 1 D-day passes.

I know poker players sometimes forget there’s a whole non-poker world out there, but really there is … and one of the big stories in the big media these days is the nomination of Solicitor General Elena Kagan for US Supreme Court.

Turns out Kagan is known amongst her posse as something of a poker player. The only contemporary Kagan I could find in the Hendon Mob any player database is Matthew Kagan, from Cambridge, MA, who min-cashed in the 2005 WSOP main event. Definitely not her, but who knows, she’s got strong Harvard ties, maybe related … ?

From newsbusters.org:

Amongst the non-ideological superlatives: ABC’s Diane Sawyer trumpeted the “historic nomination” of the “five foot three inch powerhouse,” CBS’s Crawford insisted “her interests reflect her openness. She loves softball and poker” (poker reflects “openness”?) and NBC’s Pete Williams hailed her as an “accomplished poker player, opera lover.”

From CNN:

Kagan also plays poker and drinks beer, according to Litman, who described her as “someone who from early on has focused on the law’s impact on people’s lives.”

The Daily Show:

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PLO can be a wicked temptress and a sexy bitch.

Supposedly the Pokerati Game made on its own this past Tuesday around midnight, with @MattCWaldron duking it out into the wee hours with an unusually drinky Rex the Bald PLOcal. Not sure how the stacks ended up, but from what I hear it was some of the most vigorous song-game action the room had seen in a long time. (The Hard Rock background music tends to shift to nuevo-hip hop and variety metal during late hours, and then late-late pre-sunrise it’s a lot of classic rock.)

At last week’s game, I was pretty unhappy because things were going well until I put myself in my first difficult spot of the night. After I failed to hit my 4-outer running it twice, @JaKatkin tweeted:

And @pokerati’s implosion has begun.
10:47 PM May 6th via TweetDeck

Asshole! Katkin clearly had a read on me, as he sat to my left watching my stack dwindle post-tweet to zero, at which point I rebought and re-lost yet again. (How did he know!?!)

That was also the first week we played with officially published rules. However my one copy I had at the table got ruined when a drunk (but good player … think he mighta been a Mavenite) spilled my glass of champagne all over the nicely printed document en route to his seat in the game.

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