I want to explore the level of competition, how much play I can get for my money and whether the payouts are worth the grind.

I’m going to play at least a week of dailies around Las Vegas. Mostly, I plan to play on the Strip. But I also want to hit at least one event downtown and check out the action at an off-strip casino or two. I’ll avoid the WSOP-circuit events in town and Venetian’s Deepstack Extravaganza Series, as to stay out of the path of sharks.

If I happen to get knocked out early, I’ll do some follow-up reporting on the pay structure.

My first event started at 7 p.m. Wednesday, a $125 buy-in at Aria. The blinds opened at 25/50, with 30 minute levels.

Folks in town told me it’s one of the better events for the money.

10,000 Starting chips in the daily tournament at Aria

Wednesday’s tourney found 80 entrants, with the top 9 making money. First place paid $2,677 after play wrapped up around 3 a.m. Mine ended about an hour in, after 7-4 crippled my A-K.

Twenty minutes before cards hit the air, I received my entry card: Table 5, Seat 9.

Doyle Brunson and Eli Elezra were playing 400-800 mix one table over, and my seat directly faced them. Could I focus on cards with The Godfather sitting inches away?

I set my Vitamin Water squeezed on the felt in front of my seat.

“Excuse me, sir. Are you here for the tournament?” a floorman asked.

Yeah.

“We’ve moved your table. It’s all the way on the other side of the room.”

OK. Nice view of the coffee bar, and a rainbow tower of green, black, blue and yellow chips that added up to 10,000.

Even this close to the rail at Aria, I won’t smell the cigarette smoke outside the room.
I figured I was at a great starting table after three players had open-limped the button, and one woman paying more attention to the noise in her headphones than the cards on the table let her stack bleed quickly by chasing gutshots.

I would get nowhere near the top, however, as I ran into a kid with what’s known as fancy play syndrome.

He began the near-knockout hand with the 10,000 starting stack. I had a few more.

The dance started with his casual 2.5x raise from the hijack seat. I tried to wrest control with a three-bet on the button, holding AcKh. His four-bet earned another raise from me. He thought momentarily and shoved. I called instantly.

He turned over 7c4c, and the flop looked good: AhAd5s.

He said, “nice hand.”

No, not yet.

Turn 2.

Dealer: “He still has outs.”

No. No.

River: 3.

No. No. No.

I was eliminated a few hands later when the same villain beat my 77 with AQ. With luck like that, I opted not to rebuy.

Tonight, I’m going to hop in the 7 pm, $45 tourney at Stratosphere, which some players are calling the new Sahara, because of the small buy-in. With a little luck, I’ll get past the second level.

Check my twitter feed @randompoker for updates from the felt.

The first EPL event featured plenty of notable names absent as Daniel Negreanu, most of Team Full Tilt, and Doyle Brunson deciding not to participate. Card-holding members need to enter at least one Main Event, Pro/Am and charity event each season to maintain their card.

In a radio interview last week, Phil Hellmuth wasn’t sure if he’d play in the first event. After making his “announcement” on Twitter Monday, he made his traditional late appearance, but was eliminated shortly after the dinner break.

The EPL will hold tournaments in a variety of no-limit hold’em formats, with the inaugural event played six-handed. Registration closed at the start of level 5, nearly 8 hours after play started. The tournament clock showed 137 players entered to create a $3,085,200 prize pool. The winner at the conclusion of play Friday will earn as the top 18 places make the money. The top 27 EPL money earners return February for the $1,000,000 League Championship freeroll.

Jason Mercier and Sean Getzwiller (a Pro/Am qualifier) are the other bracelet winners from this year’s WSOP among the 63 players returning Wednesday afternoon at 12pm PST to play another six levels.

Top ten chip counts:

Eugene Katchalov – 356,300
Ben Lamb – 287,200
Brian Rast – 260,500
Antonio Esfandiari – 248,100
Noah Schwartz – 220,200
McLean Karr – 191,800
Hoyt Corkins – 187,400
Isaac Baron – 167,700
Dan O’Brien – 163,300
Erik Seidel – 161,200

The full list of chip counts along with live updates, table draws, videos and more can be found at www.epicpoker.com

Pre-M.E. Festivities

Before the Main Event, the EPL kicked off over the weekend with The $1,500 Pro/Am tournament, offering nine Main Event seats, drew a combined field of 190 entrants as the final table was filmed for the Heartland Poker Tour. Steve O’Dwyer was the winner, earning $23,810 plus his EPL Main Event Seat. The only EPL-eligible player to snag a seat on the cheap was Andy Bloch, eventually finishing 3rd. Michael Craig recaps the final table.

While the Pro/Am final table was in action, 81 players put up $240 (plus a ton of $100 rebuys and add-ons) to raise over $50,000 for Operation USA, with the money earmarked for the victims of tornadoes in Joplin, Missouri. Plenty of goodies were given to all players with Zappos contributing $2,500 to the winner. Reigning World Poker Tour Player of the Year Andy Frankenberger won the title, donating the winnings to the charity.

And Brunson reports — via the often unreliable Twitter — that he got paid his Full Tilt balance of about $150k … in a way that suggests Lederer is either going door-to-door making payouts (perhaps tidying up affairs before he has to “go away”?) or possibly just living out of his car …

ToddBrunson

He asked how much I had on tilt and I told him 150k.. He said come with me. We went to his car and he opened his trunk and paid me!!!!!! 23 hours ago

ToddBrunson
Look who I just ran into.. I told him the wsop killed me and I was cash short…… http://lockerz.com/s/121600156 23 hours ago

Either way, the stress seems to be doing Lederer right, physically at least, as the previous poster boy for the well-fed high-stakes “poker body” seems to have shed a few (dozen?) pounds around the saddle.

Persona non grata: You mean you haven’t been paid yet? Have you submitted your W-9?

And while it would be nice if someone really did get their Full Tilt balance refunded … it can’t be an ideal structure for payouts when they’re happening out of the trunk of a car, even if it is a $250k Audi.

Doyle said to have been buying up Full Tilt dollars at a discount

Meanwhile, since we’re relying on Twitter here … this seems as good a time to pass on a “rumor” that I feel confident enough about the source — someone inside Bobby’s Room — that it might reveal why Brunson’s father, Doyle, has been extra sour on poker as of late.

Supposedly, a few weeks ago, Doyle was playing in Bobby’s Room at the Bellagio, and he was tweeting about his slaughter of Billy Baxter. Soon, talk shifted (off-Twitter) to Full Tilt’s money problems. Brunson reportedly said he was confident they intended to pay, and believed they eventually would … and with that began buying up Full Tilt accounts for about 60 cents on the dollar. Can’t confirm the exact amount he purchased … but the kinda money that people playing in the highest-stakes cash game in Vegas might have on Full Tilt Poker.

The next day, the Alderney Gambling Control Commission suspended Full Tilt’s license, effectively shutting the site down indefinitely.

Well apparently the Grand Ole Man of Poker has had a change of heart. Not a medical transplant mind you, and frankly, based on his latest tweet, not even a change of heart about playing per se … but he does report his own change of mind, saying he’ll be there, in the 2011 WSOP main event … he just won’t be happy about it. And he did use the word “official”, too.

No tweets on who’s putting him in and what kinda “good for poker” guilt trip anybody or corporate entity may or may not have put on him.

@TexDolly
No main event for me.maybe the DOJ will stake me.
1:10 AM Jul 4th via Twitter for iPhone

Less than a half hour earlier Brunson tweeted:

@TexDolly
Busted… Total nightmare… Goodbye WSOP
12:42 AM Jul 4th via Twitter for iPhone

… which seems about as long as it might take to come up with such a jab at the DOJ.

UPDATE: He changed his mind.

Still looking to get confirmation on how many main events Brunson has missed before. Many seem to recall his sitting out for a few years in the ’80s — as do I — but have yet to find any definitive source on where he stands in the record books for total number of WSOP main events, consecutive or otherwise.

Brunson joins a growing list of prominent big-money pros who have publicly declared their intent to sit out the 2011 WSOP, along with big-money Full Tilters who have gone silent amid severe legal and financial difficulties and thus are expected to be no-shows.

Doyle Brunson
Phil Ivey
Tony G
Howard Lederer
Chris Ferguson

Am I missing anyone? I mean other than Russ Hamilton …

At the World Series of Poker, they announce the event and coveted bracelet winners and then play the national anthem of the country they come from. Play stops at all the cash games and the players stand and remove their hats. When an American won, my table stood with their hands over their hearts and sang. I looked out over that vast sea of poker players and was overcome by emotion. The song always gives me tingles but there was also a love and astonishment at how wonderful the playing conditions have become for this sport. Yes, it is a sport.

The players’ manners are terrific today compared to the past. Johnny Moss was known for being abusive to dealers. Puggy Pearson was worse. He pissed on one once. Another Hall of Famer, Joe Bernstein, bit a dealer.

I cannot sing enough praise for the poker management of Harrah’s. I had long conversations with Bill Sattler, Director of Poker, and aslo Jake Reville, Cathy Klufer, and Carrie Jacobs. For twenty years, I taught management subjects at Texas Tech. The magnificent professionalism of Harrah’s management makes me wish I could go lecture on how great they are. I played in the cheap no limit where you only buy $300. I’ve never lost at the Rio, but only played there seven times. I’m not trying to beat the best in the world anymore. I’m too old.

My first trip to the World Series was in 1975. I first went to Las Vegas in 1960 to work as a shill in the poker room at the Golden Nugget, playing poker on house money. When I would look out over that poker heaven called the Rio and thousands of players, I’d remember when there was only one poker table in downtown Las Vegas where the player had any chance at all to win. There was one $6 limit razz game with a 25 cent rake. The rest were “snatch games.” The rake was stronger than Grandma’s breath. I never saw a poker winner. We shills cheated by signaling when we had a pair. We’d sat our two cards in five stud at a forty-five degree angle. Benny Binion got me the job for Bill Boyd, as I was “vouched in” by Curly Cavitt.

At the early World Series, and Binion’s cash games there seemed to be very regular squabbles, and the floor man was making constant obvious rulings. We called them the “famous Binion’s five dollar squabble” because they were holding up the game. The Rio is almost void of that. One reason is that early players often blamed the dealer for bad luck and bad beats. No matter how tough the Binion’s were, and they were even tougher than you think, they allowed verbal and even physical abuse of the dealers. Hall of Famers Johnny Moss and John Bonneti were legendary for their verbal abuse. When Bonnetti made the final table in 1990, his acid-tongued aggression did not stop. Puggy Pearson actually pissed on a dealer once. Another Hall of Famer, Joe Bernstein, bit a dealer. Puggy wore costumes. Once he came as a Native Amercian, with a full war bonnet with feathers to the floor, and war paint. At the time of the first Gulf War, he came as Saddam Hussein. Puggy parked a motor home outside Binion’s back door. On the side was painted, “I’ll play any man from any land any game that he can name for any amount that he can count.” He meant it. Puggy was a neighbor of my cousin’s, Bill Stapp. Given poker’s stigma, he told the neighborhood he was a school teacher.

I have only played at the Rio seven times, but have never seen behavior even close to the way players acted in those days. The players’ manners are terrific today compared to the past.

Bad behavior included frequently tearing up the offensive bad beat cards, throwing cards, especially at the dealer. In a home game, Gene Bass put an ace in his sandwich and ate it.

The old regular retirees who came in the early morning like shift workers would tip the dealer fifty cents. They might throw a dollar chip, and say, “Half back.” Once at the Mirage, Bill Gates played the three–six limit. He’d throw a dollar and say, “Half back.”

Late one night, back when I was damn fool enough to drink, I was ridiculing the half back crowd, and palming all the fifty cent pieces in the game and taking them off the table, which is technically rat holing, and against the rules. I now rat hole hundreds when I’m off winner and play on velvet. After a while, I looked behind me, and there was a plain clothes Binion’s tough. He gave me a really scary look, and opened his jacket to expose a big semi-automatic pistol. My behavior improved in a heart beat, and they were coming fast.

My all-time favorites of the early Hall of Famers were the gentlemen, Crandell Addington and Doyle Brunson. Both have given me dynamite quotes for my Bluff Europe articles. Crandell was younger than the rest. He still holds the record for the most main event final tables in the early days. He’d dress fantastically with boots, a perfect Stetson, and always a tie. He won a big prop bet that he would not loosen his tie during the long, long main event. Crandell looked like Hollywood’s idea of the leading man, a very handsome road gambler. He was one of the biggest road gamblers in many states by his mid-twenties. Look up Crandell Addington on google images.

One of the greatest things about the early World Series, were the stories I’d collect. For over fifty years, I’ve collected the stories and old gambling and West Texas sayings. At the Rio, I got on a really lucky rush, my best sequence of cards all year. I said, “I’m holding more hands than any manicurist in town. That hand was as big as a foot.” After fifty years, the table still laughs.

Paradise Found?
I wore a hat with my novel title, and JohnnyHughes.com on it. After awhile, someone would ask if I was Johnny Hughes. I’d reply,”Do you think I”d wear this stupid hat if I wasn’t?” At this World Series, I met Lance Bradley, editor of Bluff, and the legendary Kevin Mathers, another Bluff editor. I ran into Toupee Jay at the Cardoza booth manned by a young man with the great name of Casagrande. I talked with Nolan Dalla, who I remember a little as a loud and funny drunk at the poker table and the coffee shop. He was their press guy and he was with Benny Behan, the owner’s son which made it even funnier. He was that rarity, a charming drunk, like me. One thing that has not changed, but only grown much richer, are the stories poker players share. Now there are top writers like Al Can’t Hang, Dan Michalski, and Paul “Dr. Pauly” McGuire documenting poker’s history as it happens.

Jack Binion was the real leader and major brain behind the growth of the World Series. When he left, his sister Becky Behen, oversaw a steady decline. Once there was a dealer walk out, and she badmouthed them in the newspaper. She didn’t pay the floor staff the agreed on amount. The world class buffet went to plastic eating utensils.

When Binion’s Horseshoe closed, I went to downtown Las Vegas and peeked in the front window. One lone lamp illuminated the ghost like dice tables, and slot machines. It reminded me of a dark theater, which it really was, and the work light. That was poker’s darkest hour, and Harrah’s rode to the rescue like John Wayne and the U.S. Cavalry. Hear the bugle?

I’ve been robbed and arrested several times because of poker. I’d have to move or the game would have to move. I’ve played poker many places. Once in the basement of a Catholic hospital, an angry nun broke up the game. In the dorms, the athletic trainer broke up the games. We played in a car lot with only four chairs. Late arrivals had to sit on a tire. Once we played very high above a cold storage facility. We wore coats, our teeth were rattling, and we played seven-five low ball very fast to keep warm. I played regularly in a whore house and most with outlaws: bookies, loan sharks, thieves, many ex-convicts, lawyers, and pimps. Poker was a lot of trouble.

In going to the World Series, I’d go watch the Lady’s event, seven stud on Mother’s Day. I was there when Poker Hall of Famer Barbara Enright was the first woman at the final table.

The contrast with the ideal playing conditions at the Rio is striking. There was very little waiting time. The people from all over the world were friendly conversationalists.

The dealer training and employee courtesy add to the enjoyment. Harrah’s saved poker and made it what it is today. Their corporate culture produces skilled leaders like Bill Sattler, Jake Reville, Cathy Klufa, and Carrie Jacobs. That culture can be felt on the felt. Good vibes! Poker has come a long way. Harrah’s deserves a lot of the credit. I stay at the centrally located and reasonable Imperial Palace, another Harrah’s property with a nice, small poker room. I’ll be back!

The attorney who filed the suit, David Chesnoff, is kinda a big deal. He’s the former law partner of Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman, has been an ABC Legal News analyst, and recently secured walks for Bruno Mars and Paris Hilton on cocaine charges. Other celebrity clients have included Vince Neil, Jamie Foxx, Mike Tyson, the Jackson family, Leonardo DiCaprio, Shaquille O’neal, Andre Agassi, Martha Stewart, Suge Knight, Nate Dogg … the list goes on and on — mostly criminal cases, some civil. But beyond having an A-list media component to his practice, Chesnoff is also a semi-regular high stakes poker player in Las Vegas — no stranger to the banter in Bobby’s Room and thus the inner workings of the poker world — with a remarkably successful record, legally, against the Feds.

Chesnoff is the guy who helped Doyle Brunson beat the SEC on a $700 million WPT pump-and-dump rap … which may or may not have had anything to do with his getting an invite to the ’06 NBC National Heads-up Championship, where he finished 9th. He also helped Shawn Shiekhan avoid deportation in the face of charges from the Department of Homeland Security. His other big wins against state and federal prosecutors include an acquittal for a “Scarfo” mobster facing the death penalty; an acquittal for a dude busted with 15 tons of hashish in California on grounds of entrapment; and a hung jury in case against kingpins snared in a $6.9 billion cocaine seizure — the biggest drug bust in US history.

He also scored a huge win for Terence Watanabe, one of the biggest whales in Vegas history, who faced severe civil and criminal penalties for welching on nearly $15 million in casino markers, by getting Caesars (then Harrah’s) to drop their claims on the grounds that management at Caesars Palace and the Rio shouldn’t have gotten him so drunk.

Chesnoff’s success runs the gamut — in courtrooms from Clark County to the DOJ’s Southern District of New York — all in all the kinda guy you’d think a Full Tilt exec might wanna hire. But that, of course, is no longer an option with the Ivey suit.

Other Chesnoff poker clients have included Mike Matusow, Kenna James, Johnny Chan, Crispin Leyser, and Russ Hamilton.

We’ll see where the Ivey case goes, obv … and what other criminal and/or civil actions may or may not get wrapped up in it. But beyond seeking $150 million, Ivey vs. Full Tilt marks a huge rift in Full Tilt ranks and fits curiously with statements of intent from Chesnoff’s firm’s own web bio:

Chesnoff & Schonfeld have taken the most difficult of cases, developed new law and have set precedents in the fields of constitutional, criminal and forfeiture law.

“A major distinction between our firm and other law firms is we take cases with the understanding that we’re taking it to trial.”

@JimShipley wrote:

How rigged was the beer pong seeding you fuck! You’re in the effin ladies bracket. Fuller and I play last yrs champion if we win?

From there the evidence was mounting. 2+2 posters did a statistical analysis and noticed discrepancies that stretched far beyond the realm of variance:

Facing all these allegations and (screams for a life-ban from poker), @Pokerati admitted “Indeed, there absolutely was no random draw involved! But I’m not sorry … I’d do it again!” In the meantime Beer Pong officials and Pokerati Corporate have invited the Kahnawake Gaming Commission to investigate.

Perhaps pressuring me into this ethical compromise, John Katkin had to back out as my partner, and that left me with untested PokerNews young-gun Drew Flynn as his replacement. though I think my team actually improves with the addition of a player under 30, I just couldn’t trust the results in this situation to a truly fair and honest game.

As details of the scandal have come to light, doctored pairings revealed:

• I purposely put my team up against two presumably hot-and-young Hogs & Heifers bartenders, figuring it’s no-lose even if we do lose.
• If we do win, there’s a chance Team Pokerati’s next match will be against Ty Stewart and Brian Balsbaugh … I’ve wanted to chat with Stewart pre-WSOP for a while now, but just hadn’t gotten to it. Plus, I think they will likely be weak drinkers.
• If they lose, it would be Tiffany Michelle / Lisa Parsons … again, two attractive women bouncing wet balls. And if Team Pokerati is out after Round 1 … then it’s a four-girl free-for-all! Good for TV!
• There’s only one other two-lady team, Melanie Weisner / Vanessa Ping. I purposely matched them up in the first round against my poker-newsbuddy @FtrainPoker because he has a thing for petite Asian girls … and Ping seemed my best bet there.
• Was gonna put him against the Hogs team of Luci & Pedro … because I wanted to throw at least one chick his way, and even if she weren’t his type, just seemed like there’s a good chance Pedro might be gay and that could work for Ftrain, too.
• Put this year’s favorites of Todd Brunson and Brett Jungblutt against a Hogs Team in the first round, because these folks play a lot of beer pong and make for a really tough match right from the start.
• Intentionally put Team Erick/Erica against Chad Brown and Vanessa Rousso in round 1 … because they’re all make for such dern cute poker couplings. Will be good for video and help capture the chick-flick audience.
• There was a typo in the spelling of @AlCantHang’s name, and thus I put Matt Stout and his partner “Allen Rasah” against host Hoyt Corkins … well not sure why, just because.
• In a match-up between Allie Prescott / Shaun Deeb vs. Rick Fuller / Jim Shipley … all these guys are good trash-talking buds, so again figured good for TV … and because they talk so much trash let’s see how they do in a bracket loaded with tough beer-pong semi-pros from Team Hogs, including last year’s champion.

“There’s actually more to the scandal than that,” Pokerati editor DanM admitted. “A lot of thought went into how to create the best scenarios regardless of who has the better beer pong skills.”

Perhaps coincidentally, perhaps not, Doyle Brunson happened to back out of his own Beer Pong Invitational 3 the day before the bracket was to be released. Supposedly he just had some travel and/or health matters to attend to, but word on the street is that he might have caught wind of the conspiracy and did not want his name to be associated with such shenanigans. Todd’s name being sullied by all this was fine, though.

Click here to see the 32-team single elimination bracket for the BBPI 3 …

Fun brackets & barbecue good times at Hogs & Heifers in downtown Vegas … hosted primarily by Doyle’s Room and the longstanding beer-pong team of Doyle Brunson and Hoyt Corkins. There’s still room for some 15 more booze-pounding twosomes to compete … invites limited to poker pros or poker industry types, however. I’ve partnered with Katkin, who should be training hard for the event, as I expect him to anchor our team.

Click below for enlarged details …

And click here to RSVP via Facebook.

Interesting: This event used to be called the World Series of Beer Pong, until the poker people presumably decided there wasn’t enough in the pot to put up a fight for that official name.

Funny tweet from @brokelivingJRB:

Doyle joked with Ivey about how nice it would’ve been if Phil had been on his plantation 200 years ago. Phils’ response: there’d a been a bunch of black baby Brunsons running around. Lmao

If only I had a collection of cars, I’d name them all … Free Pokerati T-shirt to anyone who outfits they’re vehicle with the above or any of the following pokertastic plates, all of which are available, some surprisingly so:

Have your own fun with the Nevada DMV here. Interestingly enough, I was looking for one for Allen Kessler … but Chainsaw is too many letters, and Chansaw is already taken.

Also … DURRR is not available, but DURRRR is.

A new-ish device, “eDeck”, lets you gamble Blackberry/iPhone-style theoretically from anywhere, but currently within the confines of three Las Vegas casinos — the Venetian, Palazzo, and M Resort. Global Gaming Business Magazine named it Best Table Game Product or Innovation for 2009. And none other than Doyle Brunson has been pimping it:

This ad has been airing in Las Vegas for the past couple months — on NBC during Poker After Dark, and on Fox during Sunday NFL games.

The product itself — developed by Cantor Gaming, a division of global financiers Cantor Fitzgerald — has more to do with blackjack and sports betting than it does poker. And Lagasse’s Stadium seems the perfect place to enjoy what it has to offer: Not only can you bet sports parlays while lounging on leather couches in front of monster flat-screens, but also it has “in-game betting” … meaning you can hedge losses, compound wins, or descend into a downward spiral toward broke-dom by betting on things like who’s gonna score next, and whether or not a team will make a field goal.

Awesome — and I don’t even bet sports! But what really got me when I first saw this ad is what it suggests about the future of gambling in terms of handheld technology, business relationships, and legal jurisdictions.

Seriously, did we ever expect to see:

A) A poker commercial without an online poker room anywhere near it.
B) Doyle Brunson as a marketable commodity outside of poker.
C) An ad airing during an NFL game that closes with the tagline, “a complete casino in the palm of your hand.”

Especially C!

Cantor has been working on the eDeck (branded “PocketCasino” at Venetian properties) for years. I first took note during my Thrillist days, when they were running trials and waiting on regulatory approval. Now, in addition to the comfort-fun at Palazzo, you can do your sports-betting without missing a blind at the Venetian poker room.

From a legal perspective … all this online betting and money-transfer is now totally allowable in the United States Nevada (at least for Cantor), so long as it stays within the confines of a (licensed) casino.

Seeing things that way, and thinking of states like California and Kentucky who want to regulate online gambling within their borders, you realize that the big issue in everything online gambling that will Congress may or may not debate in 2010 is really a matter of where do you draw the lines — not morally, but geographically — of where people can engage in recreational vice.

Here’s something similar, a simple iPhone app in England, where they are willing to let the transmission of data and money be “free” throughout the country:

It has a $550 buy-in (with $200 rebuys through the first hour). Early RSVPs include the likes of Doyle Brunson and the usual crew of high-stakes Las Vegas charity-circuit rounders, along with Phil Laak, Sam Simon, Jennifer Tilly, and others. Here’s a video invitation from Tilly, with more details about the tournament itself.

This event is put on by everybody’s favorite omnipresent scooter-rider at the WSOP, Jacob Zalewski, and raises money for his One Step Closer Foundation’s fight to make life easier for Cerebral Palsey sufferers like Terrance, featured in the video below:

She doesn’t know who Texas Dolly is and says he has no ground to stand on criticizing her until “he’s 76 years old and had a career like I’ve had”. Some truly laughable poker-hating gems.

Joan Rivers on Doyle Brunson

UPDATE:

Doyle Responds

Neato. “It’s gonna ROCK!”

That’s what we wanna know … after Saturday/Sunday’s marathon 9->2 session … how long do you think the heads-up battle between Darvin Moon and Joe Cada will go?

They’re currently in Level 39, with blinds at 500k/1000k + 150k.

Moon has almost the same number of chips he started with, 58,850,000, while Cada, who started with just 13,215,000, now has all the rest — 135,950,000.

What they’re fighting for, essentially: $3.36 million in cash, and then everything else that goes with being WSOP champ.

NOTE: In our previous unscientific poll, Moon got the second-most votes … Cada fourth-most.

The record for WSOP heads-up battles is 7 hours 10 minutes, set by Chip Reese vs. Andy Bloch in 2006. Before that it was 7 hours, in the 1983 main event … where after Doyle Brunson busted out in 3rd on a semi-bluff, an unknown from Michigan, Tom McEvoy, beat Rod Peate for $580,000:

BTW, for a fun historical perspective, watch the start of the television coverage of the 1983 final table here.

You're not putting this on eBay, are you?

Who says you need to final table to make money at the WSOP?

GSN’S “HIGH STAKES POKER™” ANNOUNCES LAUNCH OF
SIXTH SEASON, WITH A REFRESHED PLAYER LINE-UP AND A
BRAND-NEW LOOK THAT PUTS VIEWERS ON THE SCENE

Professional Poker Player and Journalist Kara Scott Joins Gabe Kaplan as Co-Host
When the Series Goes Into Production in November;

Season Six of HIGH STAKES POKER Premieres February 14, 2010, Only on GSN

(SANTA MONICA, Calif.) November 5, 2009 – GSN announced today the launch of the highly anticipated sixth season of HIGH STAKES POKER™, featuring a line-up of renowned poker champions, cash game specialists and promising up-and-comers, along with a brand-new look and feel for the show that puts viewers in the thick of the poker action. Acclaimed poker player, TV personality and journalist Kara Scott joins Gabe Kaplan as co-host of HIGH STAKES POKER when the series shoots its sixth season this November at the Golden Nugget Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas, NV. Scott will report from the High Stakes Poker suite, interviewing poker players about poker strategy, big hands and the table dynamics. Season 6 of HIGH STAKES POKER will premiere on February 14, 2010, airing Sunday nights at 8:00 PM (ET), with encore airings Sundays at 11:00 PM and 2:00 AM (ET), only on GSN.

Featuring a minimum cash buy-in of $200,000, HIGH STAKES POKER is the premier cash game in the history of television. The new season showcases some of the world’s top professional and amateur players; a partial list of the competitors expected to play follows. (Individual player bios can be found at the end of this release. Final player line-up is subject to change):

* Patrik Antonius
* David Benyamine
* Doyle Brunson
* Tom Dwan
* Eli Elezra
* Antonio Esfandiari
* Sammy George
* Barry Greenstein
* Phil Hellmuth
* Andreas Hoivold
* Phil Ivey
* Mike Matusow
* Allan Meltzer
* Daniel Negreanu
* Dennis Phillips
* Lex Veldhuis
* Yevgeniy Timoshenko

New co-host Kara Scott is well-known to European audiences as a poker player and journalist, having been the TV host of the European Poker Tour in 2007 and 2008. As a player, Scott was the only woman to finish in the money in both the 2008 and 2009 World Series of Poker Main Events, and only the second woman in history to do so in back-to-back years. She also finished second in the 2009 Irish Open in Dublin.

Gabe Kaplan, whose knowledge of poker and ability to explain the nuances of the cash game have made him a viewer favorite, returns for his sixth season as the analyst on HIGH STAKES POKER. As a world class poker player, Kaplan has made the final table in six World Series of Poker events, won the Super Bowl of Poker twice and finished third in the WPT 2004 Mirage Poker Showdown. Kaplan is best known for his starring role as the teacher and reformed “Sweathog” on the hit television series “Welcome Back Kotter.” He has also appeared in theater productions, originating the role of “Groucho, A Life In Review,” and starring in the national touring company of the successful Broadway comedy, “Doubles.”

High Stakes Poker (Season Six), Player Bios:

* Patrik Antonius (previous appearances: HSP3, 4 and 5)—The Helsinki, Finland native and former model and tennis player is considered one of the best short-handed high-stakes cash game players in the world. Antonius is known for his cool, calm, calculating style of play at the tables, which has earned him in excess of $2.84 million in lifetime live tournament winnings.

· David Benyamine (HSP2, 3, 4, 5)—The French native and former pro tennis player now lives in Las Vegas and is considered one of the best high-stakes cash game players in the world, especially in pot-limit Omaha. He owns one WPT open title and one WPT invitational title, and won his first WSOP bracelet in the $10,000 Omaha Hi/Lo World Championship in 2008. With lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $3.47 million, he ranks #2 on France’s all-time money list.

* Doyle Brunson (HSP1, 2, 3, 4, 5)—At the age of 76, Brunson is perhaps the greatest player of all time, and is the author of several books, including Super System and Super System II. Impressively, he won the World Series of Poker Main Event in 1976 and 1977. Ranked 33rd on the all-time money list, he has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $5.87 million. He’s the owner of 10 WSOP bracelets, and has left his mark on the game: the WPT Five Diamond World Poker Classic was renamed the Doyle Brunson Five Diamond World Poker Classic in 2007.

* Tom Dwan (HSP5)—Known to his huge online fan base as “durrrr,” Dwan is considered one of poker’s premier cash game players despite his young age. He made two final tables in the 2008 World Series of Poker (the first he was old enough to play in), and has live career tournament winnings in excess of $1.12 million.

* Eli Elezra (HSP1, 2, 3, 4, 5)—A former member of an Israeli army commando unit, Elezra is a highly successful Las Vegas businessman and entrepreneur who considers poker just a hobby—but boasts lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $1.91 million. He won his first World Series bracelet in 2007 in 7-card stud hi/lo, and also owns one WPT title.

* Antonio Esfandiari (HSP1, 2, 3, 4, 5)—“The Magician” is indeed a former professional magician and has been a regular in this game since the show’s inception. Esfandiari finished 24th in the 2009 WSOP Main Event, and has career live tournament winnings in excess of $3.49 million. He is also the winner of one WSOP bracelet and one WPT title.

* Sammy George (first appearance on HSP)— Born in Baghdad, Iraq, George moved to England when he was eight years old, and is now an extremely successful London businessman who plays in the highest-stakes cash games available. George says he will play deuce/seven like aces if he thinks the psychological make-up of his opponent warrants it. His nickname is “Any Two.”

* Barry Greenstein (HSP1, 2, 3, 4, 5)—Ranked 23rd on the all-time money list, with career live tournament winnings of almost $7 million, Greenstein has been dubbed the “Robin Hood of Poker” for being one of the first players to donate winnings to charity, his favorite being Children, Incorporated. He’s the winner of two WPT titles and three WSOP bracelets, the latest in the 2008 $1500 Razz event. He is the author of Ace on the River, which he signs and gives to any player who knocks him out of the tournament.

* Phil Hellmuth (HSP1, 4)—Known as the “Poker Brat,” Hellmuth was inducted into the Poker Hall of Fame in July 2007. He won his 11th World Series bracelet in 2007, making him the first and only person in history to do so. With 6 cashes in the 2009 WSOP, he now has more World Series cashes (75) and has made more WSOP final tables (41) than any player in history. His career live tournament winnings are in excess of $10.92 million, and he ranks 4th on the all-time money list.

* Andreas Hoivold (first appearance on HSP)—The 37-year-old English native now lives in Kristiansand, Norway, and says if he could change one thing about poker, it would be to legalize live poker in Norway. Nicknamed the “Cartoon Collector,” his card protector is a Mickey Mouse. He won the 2007 EPT Dortmund, good for $880,000, and has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $1.51 million.

· Phil Ivey (HSP3)— Highly regarded by many as the best player in the game today, Ivey ranks 3rd on the all-time money list, with career live tournament winnings in excess of $12.09 million. He’s the winner of seven WSOP bracelets, and one of only five players to win three in one year (2002). He capped off a terrific 2009 WSOP (during which he won two WSOP bracelets) by becoming a member of the November Nine.

* Mike Matusow (HSP2, 3, 4)—Known as “The Mouth” for his trash-talking, Matusow is one of poker’s most recognizable players. He’s the winner of three WSOP bracelets, his latest in the prestigious 2008 $5000 no-limit 2-7 draw event w/rebuys, and has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $7.29 million. His recently released autobiography, Check-Raising the Devil, is a candid look at his life and the many battles he has faced in his rise to stardom.

* Allan Meltzer (HSP5)—The man who once sold pretzels in the street in Brooklyn is now the president of Wind-up Records, the largest independent recording label in the U.S. A successful high-stakes amateur poker player, Meltzer plays with hedge fund managers in New York, the high-stakes crowd in Hollywood, and in Bobby’s Room at the Bellagio.

* Daniel Negreanu (HSP1, 2, 3, 4, 5)—One of poker’s most likeable personalities, “Kid Poker” owns four WSOP bracelets, the latest in a 2008 WSOP $2000 limit hold ’em event, as well as two WPT titles. With his 2nd place showing in the 2009 WSOPE Main Event in October 2009, he now has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $12.42 million and ranks #1 on the all-time money list.

· Dennis Phillips (first appearance on HSP)—The 54-year-old is a former account manager for a commercial trucking company—a company he is now in the process of buying. He was a member of the 2008 WSOP November Nine, and finished 3rd in the Championship Event, good for $4.51 million; he has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $4.76 million. Phillips works with 22 different charities, most notably Multiple Sclerosis, The Pujols Family Foundation, CancerPrevention.org and Juvenile Diabetes. He lives in St. Louis, Missouri.

* Lex Veldhuis (first appearance on HSP)—Born in Vlissingen, Netherlands, Velhuis now splits his time between Rotterdam and Las Vegas as a jet-setting pro. A former gamer, he currently multitables high-stakes cash games online, where he’s known by his screen name “RaSZi,” and has topped the PokerStars Tournament Leader Board twice. He finished 7th in the 2009 WSOP $40,000 NLHE 40th Anniversary Event, good for $277,000.

* Yevgeniy Timoshenko (first appearance on HSP)—Born in Ukraine in 1988, Timoshenko lives in Seattle, Washington, and is also known by screennames “Jovial Gent” and “Bballer88.” He won the 2009 WPT Championship, good for $2.15 million, as well as the World Championship of Online Poker Main Event in 2009, good for $1.71 million. He has lifetime live tournament winnings in excess of $3.22 million and is ranked 4th on the 2009 money list.