LAS VEGAS–Funny how being in Las Vegas has put me so out of touch with all the poker news. I think there are some big tournaments going on, online poker execs in the courts, business deals shaking down, but I’ve got little to report other than poker being played. Still, it’s been kinda interesting to see who you run into at the tables around this town:

The first notable I ran into was OREL HERSHEISER, who apparently just moved here to Las Vegas and sat to my left in a 1/2 NLH game at RED ROCK — fresh after being denied selection into the baseball HALL OF FAME. I tried to play the not-knowing-who-he-is thing — “You lost a vote? Were you running for city council or congress or something?” — but he would end up busting me out when I tried to run a little STOP-N-GO. As I pushed all-in, he asked, “How much money do you have?”

“Um, I’m all-in. About $140 more,” I said, pointing to my stacks.

“No, I mean other money. Because we can make a little side-bet away from the table,” he said, upon showing me THE NUTS.

Red Rock seems to be the OFF-STRIP place to be. On my second post-WSOP outing there, I ran into GARY THOMPSON — World Series of Poker media master and tournament overlord. He was wearing comfortable jeans, loafers, and a button-down shirt while playing 2/5 NLH. With about $800 in front of him, he said he was “down a couple hundred.” But it wouldn’t take long for him to grow his stacks, and a few hours later, he had moved up to the 5/10 game and had what looked to be about $2k.

On that same day, I saw A GUY I BUSTED at the Rio. He was a good player who went with the whole BLACK HOODIE and SUNGLASSES kinda thing, while saying almost nothing and acting with stoic (but angry) CHRIS FERGUSON-like motions. He was playing 1/2 NLH and nursing about $200.

Over at THE VENETIAN in the 2/5 game, I found myself up against a WSOP Dealer — SHAI the ISRAELI GUY. He was sick when I pushed all-in and convinced him to fold his top-pair-top-kicker that would turn into TOP BOAT … only to see the guy who took down the pot from me win with KING-HIGH. A couple hours later I was playing a goofy hand with K-6 offsuit in late position, the flop came K-7-K … he checks, I bet, he raises big, I call. Turn is a 6, he pushes all-in, I call … at which point he shows his POCKET 7s. The table cheers for a FOURTH SEVEN, but it doesn’t come and I send him to the ATM.

One table over, KARINA JETT’S MOTHER was playing — beyond her typical quiet game, she was practically falling asleep at the table (at 3 AM) while nursing about $400. She may not remember this, but she won a $15 PROP BET from me once over a RULES DISPUTE. (My bad … I thought I knew stuff.)

Back at RED ROCK a couple days later, I ran into ABRAHAM, and he really deserves his own post, because he tilted the table unlike anything I had ever seen — and even managed to invoke mockery from a cute young girl who wasn’t playing. Basically imagine the worst personality and poker characteristics of ME, TIM ROGERS and EON MARSHALL all wrapped up into an obnoxious kid who graduated from high school in 2003 and is well aware that he looks like STU UNGAR. Then give him a lot of chips. (His behavior and play was so table-altering it had me interrupting TOM SCHNEIDER’S vacation in ST. THOMAS for some emergency coaching … who advised me well until I played back without paying attention to a guy to my left who had pocket kings.)

I really wanted to KILL THIS KID, or at least make him cry. And so did everyone else — especially the old (presumably) gay man who he busted by calling a $260 raise pre-flop with 2-3 suited only to flop two threes. But he can’t be all that bad, because without provoking from me, he at one point shouted, “THE HAMMER!” with glee. Hey kid, if you are reading this, what I told you at the table after you “bluffed” me with pocket-5s and then taunted (it took me a good five minutes to lay down Ace-high) still applies: “I look forward to seeing you get your education.” Punk-ass. Like seriously, you had at least two of us at the table contemplating how one might go about rolling you in the parking lot.

One of the cool things about Red Rock is that when you need to shake off a bad beat or just step away from a dipshit the table to refocus, you can go BOWL A GAME 24 hours a day — for $3 +$3.50 for shoes. That seems like positive EV.

The picture above is from a day I didn’t actually play poker … but I did walk through the poker room just for funsies after bowling, and whom should I run into but NOLAN DALLA, longtime Dallas poker expat and WSOP media guru, legendary sports handicapper, and Stu Ungar biographer. He was wearing CARGO SHORTS, a frumpled shirt, and seemed pleasantly drinky while playing 5/10 NLH with a couple old friends from POKERSTARS.

“I’m stuck $800 but having a great time!” he screamed upon embracing me with a BEAR HUG. “Isn’t this a great casino!?! Hey everybody, it’s Dan from Pokerati!”

Murmur?

“Oh, right …” Nolan said. “Didn’t mean to blow your cover.”

I also ran into STEVE HALL one night at Red Rock, too. He was playing PENNY VIDEO SLOTS. He had a big hit of some sort of crazy picture combinations that won him about $60.

And then to top it all off, I went to CAESAR’S PALACE with DON JONES (of Rounder Club fame), LEIGH & BRIAN from the Poker Atlas , DOCTOR STEVE, and former Absolute Poker marketing chick JEN TIDWELL to play in their 50-player-max $65 tourney. We all had 10 percent of each other, which proved irrelevant as our top player would bubble.

I was the first to bust out (of the tournament) and would take a seat playing some 2/5. Of all the poker tables in Las Vegas … what are the chances that DAN BALLENGER (aka HONG KONG SUE, father of SON OF SUE) would get seated at my table? It would take more than a full orbit before he realized he was sitting with a fellow BATFACE. He bought in for $500 and cashed out a couple hours later for a little less than that. HKS got most of those chips from me … calling a $100 bluff with second-pair-no-kicker (what was I THINKING!?!) … and then bluffing me out of a $400+ pot on the river, getting me to lay down aces. He mucked at the time, but told me as he left that he pushed all-in for his remaining $135 with an underpair. Wish I hadn’t asked, because it had me semi-tilting for a good 30 minutes or more. I know he was just trying to be nice, but still …

Then JASON from JACKIE’S (in Dallas) and “RICKY ZILEM” showed up. They were just walking through checking out the action. Fancy running into these guys here. Chris/Ricky, said, “I did what nobody does when they first land in Vegas and took a nap.”

Ah, indeed.

Small world. Good times.

UPDATE: Players are headed to returning from dinner break. JOSH EVANS is up to roughly 360,000. JERRY RANDACK is hanging on with 50something-thousand. PRIMO appears to be out. Quite a few pros are thriving … over/under on the number of known names who make the final table: 1.9. (This unofficial line could move.) People to watch today include:

TODD BRUNSON, DANIEL NEGREANU, LUCKY LIU, THOR HANSEN, CHRIS FERGUSON, ROBERT VARKONYI, CHIP JETT, BILL EDLER, CARLOS MORTENSON, JC TRAN, TED FORREST, CHAD BROWN, JOHN MURPHY, MIKE LAING, FABRICE SOULIER, a bunch of other “ferriners,” CHRIS MONEYMAKER, LEIF FORCE, et al.

They look to join JOHN DUTHIE, HUCK SEED, Dallas guy VANDY KROUCH, JAN SORENSON, BERRY JOHNSTON, ROBERT MIZRACHI, TOBEY MAGUIRE, JASON LESTER, BILLY BAXTER, SCOTTY NGUYEN, and too many others to name. Still early, I guess … even though we’ve whittled through nearly 3/4 of the field.

Chris Moneymaker, against the wall, wondering who’s going to be the next … him.

LAS VEGAS–Even though the World Series has suddenly kicked into a serious, all-about-poker phase, there’s a lot of interesting stuff going on off the tables that you might want to check out between refreshes for Day 2 main-event updates.

The Fresh Princess and I sat down for an interview yesterday on WSOP TV. It ran live but the archives aren’t up yet. We had some tough acts to follow, going on after former Sen. Al D’Amato of the PPA and Rep. Robert Wexler (D-FL):

Then, right before we were about to go on, JEFFREY POLLACK showed up wanting to chat a bit:

Speaking of … THE JEFFSTER has a new blog post up … always a worthwhile read, considering that he has more influence on the future of poker than just about anyone else.

According to USA TODAY, all is well in the poker world … in fact, better than expected based on the 2007 main event numbers. Can you imagine what this event woulda been if there wasn’t a UIGEA and PARTYPOKER pull-out? Logistical nightmare, to say the least.

An interesting article here about DAVID SINGER being denied his requested MAIN EVENT REFUND for theoretical inconsistencies in rules about cell phone and text messaging usage.

Meanwhile, poker media, players, and officials are abuzz about a CBS SPORTSLINE article about the INHERENT, OVERLOOKED EVILS of poker.

No worries. People said the same things about ROCK ‘N’ ROLL and JAZZ. Such are the archetypes of American culture. Hey, check out this neato “antique” book I just bought:

The USA TODAY reporter obviously doesn’t read blogs. For example, over on WiseHandPoker, MARK NEWHOUSE spells out why DUSTIN “Neverwin” WOOLF may or may not be a shyster — accusing him of owing lots and lots of money and calling his friend a SCUMBAG.

That’s good stuff, no!?! Kinda like sports/politics/business.

UPDATE (4:39 pdt): JOSH EVANS still kicking ass. 300k in chips puts him near the top.

LAS VEGAS–Day 2b action is well underway about to get underway. In fact, it probably already will be so by the time this post is finished. It rained last night in Las Vegas — I knew it would!

Today, like yesterday, is all about the serious, “somber” poker. Most of the folks who got chips early by getting lucky will be getting knocked out. Short stacks will consistently be all-in. And serious players with a real chance of going deep will figure out if they’ll be nursing their chips into the money or making moves to put them in a position to really contend.

2007 WSOP Player of the Year TOM SCHNEIDER, by the way, is out. Happened a few hands after the dinner break, at which point he told me he was so beat down from the World Series that he didn’t really care if he got eliminated, because it would mean he could go home. Shocking with that attitude that he didn’t win.

Perhaps RANDY BROWN will do better. He starts today with 67,000 chips.

UPDATE: TBR is out. Lost every hand he played, he says. Got it all-in on the button, pushing with pocket 9s into a single-limped pot. The small blind woke up with Kings, the big blind with Aces. The BATFACES officially go 0-fer in the 2007 WSOP, but win the award for best hats.

Better luck next year, “The Big Randy.” You seem to have Day 1 figured out, but can’t make it through Day 2 with terrible cards unless you have a tiny, tiny stack.

TBR, by the way, was sitting virtually back-to-back with SHANNON ELIZABETH throughout Day 1. Nice! Go Poker!

Oops, zoom lens malfunction … Anyhow, yes, SHANNON ELIZABETH is out.

JOSH EVANS (below, left) will be a guy to really watch, as he carries 240,000 chips into Day 2 … with the money just a day-and-a-half only a day away.

And another North Texas pokerer fighting to make it to the pre-money bubble is JERRY RANDACK (right). Considering that he took 2nd place in the 2007 Pokerati Invitational, we like his chances.

Dallas big-game player PRIMO is also still alive. He’s seen here tearing up the $5/$10 NLH cash game (moments away from bluffing — oops! — away more than $1,300 in a hand).

We’re still looking for VANDY CROUCH — seen here, cashing in the 6-handed No-Limit event — who is rumored to be protecting some 240,000 chips.

UPDATE: I mean not like right now. He finished Day 2a with about that many. He makes it to Day 3 — where the fight for the money begins!

For those who may have missed it, ROUNDER CLUB representative CHRIS COMO did not move on to day 2. Despite building up his stacks and taking control of his table, he got beat down toward the end of the day, and, in the end, surrendered them to online powerhouse CARL OLSON.

LAS VEGAS–Yesterday was kinda a crazy day — full moon and all — and today looks to be just a shade less looney.

Play has just three hours ago gotten underway in the last $1,500 NLH. According to Mean Gene:

Eerily Quiet
You put 3,000 people in a room you’d think there’d be a bit of noise, but as with the other $1,500 events we’ve covered the room falls nearly silent when play begins. For so many of these players this is their first World Series event and while they have their game faces on, it takes some time for them to find their voices. A dry mouth will do that to you.

The final table of $1,000 7-stud Hi Lo gets underway at 3 pm. This was supposed to be just a two-day event. TOM SCHNEIDER entered into nine-handed play last night (with a random fifth alternating between two tables) as the shortest stack; he’ll take his seat as the CHIP LEADER.

Hoyt Verner 129,000
Scotty Nguyen 203,000
Hieu “Tony” Ma 60,000
Saundra Taylor 202,000
Tom Schneider 275,000
Tommy Hang 110,000
Miguel De La Cruz 253,000
Woody Deck 110,000

SCOTTY NGUYEN should be sober by then. He gave Tom a lot of chips as he got drinky and aggressive in the wee hours, turning over bluff after bluff as Tom drank with him and laughed it up while rebuilding his stacks.

Dallas poker lady SONG WEBB, by the way, won $4,498 for finishing 26th; and OLIVER TSE (who started the day at Tom’s table) scored his first WSOP cash (in 11 tries) with a 21st place for $5,106.

Oliver stuck around last night long after he busted because, in his off-the-table attempts to become the BRIAN BALSBAUGH of non-American players, he was chasing down a couple GERMANS fighting for a seat at the final table.

Click here to follow today’s bracelet-eyed action semi-live.

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Also going on is Day 2 of $1,000 2-7 Triple Draw with Rebuys. Blogger GARTHMEISTER J was rockin’ until a “brutal” last half hour yesterday left him in the middle of a skill-studded pack.

Garthy giving a shout out to the Batfaces.

Getting underway about an hour ago is the final table of $5,000 Short-handed No-Limit Hold’em:

Seat 1: Greg Pohler – 655,000
Seat 2: Alex Bolotin – 2,010,000
Seat 3: Gioi Luong – 570,00
Seat 4: Bill Edler – 535,000
Seat 5: Dutch Boyd – 705,000
Seat 6: Erik Friberg – 2,795,000

Some friendly North Texas faces made quite a showing in this event …

Raj Kattamuri (left) finished in 13th place, winning $27,031. Vandy Krouch got $16,766 for finishing 26th. And GREGG MERKOW eeked into the money — 78th place, $6,159.

Other notable cashers include: Tobey Maguire, Vicki Coren, Jamie Gold, Scott Clements, Men the Master, Justin Bonomo, Phil Hellmuth, and Dustin Woolf.

Day 2 of the $2,000 NL Hold’em event is rolling — playing down from 147 players to a final table. This event also featured a ROUNDER CLUB cash: GINA Salinas-Torres won $4,080 for finishing 180th. Way to go, Gina!

Check this out:

A drunken THOMAS WAHLROOS showing how the Euros like to have fun fucking with HELLMUTH …

[via Shuttergypsy]

The EUROS are arriving in force. ENGLISH-ONLY is becoming more and more of a rules call throughout the Rio and Las Vegas. Just ask STEVE WONG, who finished 7th in the SHORT-HANDED event, or MARCEL LUSKE, who fell short of winning a bracelet yesterday in $2,000 Omaha Hi Lo …

LAS VEGAS–The $50k HORSE event finished up this morning … and FREDDIE DEEB is officially crowned the best all-around poker player in the world for the time being.

You can only presume HARRAH’S OFFICIALS are breathing a sigh of relief — after having pimped the tourney as the biggest deal, it makes a much better story to give the title to an immigrant who came to America to save his family from war and turned to poker as a way to make good while AMERICAN IMMIGRATION BUREAUCRACY futzed around with his ability to earn a living.

Had JOHN HANSEN won, the story would’ve been about a relatively unknown bad-ass from the NEW YORK hardcore poker underground. Less savory.

Speaking of LEGALLY QUESTIONABLE poker players, did you know drug kingpin JIMMY CHAGRA — released from prison earlier this year — played in the SENIORS EVENT?

He was on “Talkin’ Trash” with BRIAN WILSON just a couple days ago. [via Gary Wise on 2+2.]

JEFFREY POLLACK did a little semi-live blogging from the HORSE final table. Maddest props to the Commish — not only for letting us know what he heard from the poker-players town hall, but also for providing his first-ever outbound link. Puts him on a short-list of people who just-might qualify for Pokerati posting privileges some day. We’ll be watching as he continues to cut his Wicked blogging chops.

In the meantime, The Jeffster tells us:

1. There is insufficient play in the middle levels of limit games and too much in the beginning.

2. There are some instances where the color-up process isn’t being handled correctly.

3. The tent is not a comfortable place to play.

4. There needs to be more room between the spectators on the ropes and the players.

5. The next day’s breaking order should be posted when an event ends for the night.

6. We need to improve media access to final tables.

7. The sequestered tables are tough to cover for the media and follow for the fans.

8. Tournament clocks should be more visible.

9. The Amazon Room is too cold.

10. We should continue and better publicize escort service to the parking lot late at night.

Yesterday’s “other” bracelet went to a guy named SAIF AHMAD, who won the $2,000 Limit Hold’em event with relative ease.

View from the rooftop of Pokerati’s VEGAS EDGE bureau:

ERIC ROSENBERG poses an interesting question on his new-ish blog — about why official poker “stats” don’t subtract known tournament buy-ins from “winnings.” The WSOP, of course, has records of every bracelet-bound buy-in … so it could be done. Likewise, they bar-code initial seat cards, so it’s theoretically possible to provide PokerNews or whoever with the basic info on every single player whose chips they try to track.

Maybe next year?

Rosie has also spurred further conversation about BACKING-DEAL DISCLOSURE — specifically as it pertained to BILL CHEN’S WSOP-approved chip-dumping agreement. It’s not about gratuitous rabble-rousing so much as it is about decisions that will affect the future of poker, regardless of what they are.

So the $1,000 7-Stud Hi Lo continues today. Pokerati’s own TOM SCHNEIDER sits down with 4,300 chips. We’ll find out if North Texas pokerer DAMON RAMIREZ is still alive. And DOYLE BRUNSON takes his second stab at bracelet #11 with 10,700 chips. Pokerati fantasy man STEVE WONG also ain’t too far behind.

Follow the 7-Stud Hi Lo action today here.

Today’s other tournament action:

Day 1 of $2,000 No Limit Hold’em
Day 2 of the $5,000 World Championship of Short-handed No-Limit Holde’m.

And the final table for $2,000 Omaha Hi Lo gets underway, with at least one familiar professional face, who will see if he can hold on to the chip lead.

Seat 1- Martin Corpuz, Jr. 292,000
Seat 2- Ming Lee 373,000
Seat 3- Mitch Maples 70,000
Seat 4- Thang Luu 238,000
Seat 5- Jess Robinson 255,000
Seat 6- Frankie O’Dell 318,000
Seat 7- Marcel Luske 427,000
Seat 8- Marvin Ryan 104,000
Seat 9- Stuart Paterson 58,000

LAS VEGAS–Here’s what’s going on today at the WSOP, and some of what’s recently gone down leading up to it all:

A Canadian Polack named LUKASZ DUMANSKI won the $1,500 Omaha Hi Lo event. Go non-American players!

The $50,000 HORSE final table has been set.

Interesting field and chip situations …
Amnon Filippi 4,015,000
Freddy Deeb 3,500,000
Kenny Tran 2,445,000
John Hanson 1,995,000
David Singer 1,330,000
Bruno Fitoussi 895,000
Barry Greenstein 750,000
Thor Hansen 40,000

(Pokerati fave GABE KAPLAN went out on the final table bubble, in 9th place.)

Click here to follow the coverage of today’s action, where they will continue to mix games and not play a final table of just no-limit hold’em. Any odds on what will be the final game?

You’ll notice that TOM SCHNEIDER is not there. He went out early in Day 2. He was in the Big-little-big one for $34,000. The rest went to a smattering of backers, to whom 9 percent was available for $5,000. Can Tom build on his early WSOP success and make that third final table without dropping below the six-figure mark? After paying taxes, BACKERS, and living expenses associated with moving to Las Vegas for two months, mixed with tournament buy-ins, cash-game losses, and fancy scotches for Dan … the money can go fast during the WSOP.

But busting out early did allow him to play the $2,000 Omaha Hi Lo, which, after a night of drowning his sorrows followed the next day by a cash-game all-nighter, he played with “no sleep”:

Tom went out toward the end of Day 1.

Lori from Carrollton was dealing — with new hair no less:

She seems to be having a pretty good time — seen here sweating Pokerati fantasy poker favorite STEVE WONG, as he plays $50-a-point Chinese:

Day 2 of Omaha Hi Lo gets underway at 2 pm pacific, 4 pm central.

Day 1 was a pretty relaxed, jovial affair … presumably because it was a relatively low buy-in for the big-time pros who had busted out of the $50k HORSE event. Very fun and chatty. On a break PHIL HELLMUTH and ROBERT WILLIAMSON III had a semi-private discussion about sponsorship deals and the logistics of autographing products en masse. (The easiest are things you can sign with one hand, and slide to the side with the other.)

Robert is selling pieces of himself in by-the-inch embroidered increments. I should probably get a better picture of his jacket …

Here are the patches Hellmuth will be wearing in the main event — 13 of them so far:

Many of these are companies selling Phil’s products, but still, let’s face it, the NASCARIZATION of poker is here. Now if only the non-online-poker companies will buy in.

At the 2007 WSOP, patches are the new body paint.

The other final table today is in the $2,000 Limit Hold’em event — no known pros in this one.

Getting underway at noon is the $5,000 World Championship of 6-handed No-Limit Hold’em.

And the 5 pm (Vegas time) tourney is $1,000 7-stud Hi Lo (aka Stud 8 aka Stud 8 OB aka Stud 8 or better).

JEFFREY POLLACK has a new post up on his “blog” (yo, dudes, they’re called “posts,” OK? Get with the program … a single memo ain’t no blog, but a collection of such theoretically could be)– where he informs the poker world (at 10:30 pm last night) that there will be a “players town hall” at 10:30 am today. I’m a bigger fan than most of the poker’s most corporate representative, but either he doesn’t realize that poker hours dictate that the vast majority of players won’t see this, which is pretty bad … or he does, which is worse. But still, we kinda like The Jeffster’s relative openness in his “blogs” .:

[STEVE ZOLOTOW] was so honest with me that he started our conversation by asking for my boss’s phone number so he could call to recommend that I – and every other key WSOP executive – be fired.

Pollack, of course, ain’t going nowhere — at least not for a while — but can you imagine if the “blogs” on worldseriesofpoker.com had comments?

UPDATE: Amy informs me that the players town hall was actually held yesterday … 11-and-a-half hours before Pollack’s post went up. Nice … Here ye, hear ye!

Don’t forget to follow my following the cash game action at the Rio. It’s a little awkward poking around these games with a notepad and camera, because a lot of people make their livings at these tables and don’t really want people to know that they are good.

One such player I am following is “TEDDY,” who has become a fixture at the $100/$200 Limit Hold’em table. He’s a trip. We’ll leave it at that for now.

I’ve had a decent run at the cash games myself — except for the two times I lost, which negate a big fat win, seen here:

My second-favorite hand was dealt by Linda the Dallas dealer … who flopped me a straight and said, “I knew you had Q-J when you said, ‘This is probably a pretty bad call,’” as she shipped me a $300 pot.

Favorite hand of the night would come a little later upon busting out the dude in the background for another $600.

By the way, if you like the photos, you can see more of what Pokerati sees by checking out our FLICKR gallery.

In other news, ERICK LINDGREN beat PHIL IVEY in a $340,000 golf course prop bet. RAM VASWANI chits presumably in the mail.

LAS VEGAS–As the WSOP rolls through Week 2 (of 7), we’re in the midst of some hi-technology upgrades here at Pokerati, like signing up for FLICKR. Sorry it has taken me away from giving you all the lowdown. I also blame Tom and Michele for doing well. Very distracting to pay attention to your friends/correspondents.

TOM SCHNEIDER, interestingly enough, is atop the leaderboard in the WSOP Player of the Year Standings. Dude, wow. Keep it up. He busted out early — almost by design — in the $1,500 Pot Limit event today. (So early that PokerNews didn’t even take notice.) He’s now getting started or the $3,000 World Championship of 7-stud Hi Lo.

Click here to follow.

Also, check out my coverage of the WSOP CASH GAMES over at PokerWorks. Fun!

And this is a must-must-click for fans of THE BLUFFSTER. It’s NOLAN DALLA’S new web show that starts off with a Masterpiece Theatre kinda thing in front of a fireplace, before he walks into banks seeking loans to play in poker tournaments. Interesting perspective on what JAMIE GOLD is trying to overcome.

Headed to AUSTIN in a few hours … cards go in the air on Tuesday for a high-stakes political game that I sure-as-heck don’t wanna miss … $1 billion and the future of Texas Texas Hold’em is on the line. Like seriously. No April foolin’.

LYLE BERMAN, CRANDELL ADDINGTON, MICHAEL BOLCEREK, ERICK LINDGREN, Dallas DA CRAIG WATKINS, CLONIE GOWEN, Pokerati, et al. will be making the push for [tag]HB 3186[/tag] in front of the Licensing and Administrative Procedures committee.

Poker we know can make good TV, and you can find the live House video stream here. I get roughly THREE MINUTES to state my name for the record, tell bad beat stories, and scream “Go Batfaces!”

Hold’em Radio (which started in Austin) has moved into a NEW STUDIO in Las Vegas — at Binion’s, right by the poker room. Very cool! Live poker radio 24/7 and subsequent podcastable shenanigans just got more interesting.

Check this out … seen on I-20, en route to SHREVEPORT … a BAPTIST CHURCH dropping [tag]the hammer[/tag] in a cyber-evangelical effort to save degenerate gambling souls:

Apropos? I’m thinking of signing up to be a affiliate at PartySalvation.

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Had to check to make sure this one wasn’t an April Fool’s story … it isn’t … police in SWEDEN broke up a 700-player tourney and arrested the operators, who face up to four years in jail.

Two weeks ago, the GARDAI in NORTHERN IRELAND forced the cancellation of a similar not-so-underground event.

ONLINE GAMBLING is running into some problems in the CZECH REPUBLIC. But the companies behind the betting industry there are circumventing the legal nuisances by setting up shop in MALTA.

OK, circling back the globe … here’s the article (scroll down to the very bottom) … they are now running SATELLITES to the PPT (emphasis added):

Airport Casino Filipino Parañaque will host the first Metro Manila satellite/qualifying tournament for the 3rd Philippine Poker Tour (PPT) Million-Peso Hold’em Championship on March 31, 2007. Registration starts at 1 p.m., and tournament at 2 p.m.

[...]

Details of prize structure and tournament rules for the 3rd PPT Million-Peso Hold’em Championship are posted in the official PPT website, www.PhilippinePokerTour.com.

Meanwhile, POLAND is joining forces with ENGLAND, and I think ITALY … taking steps to officially legalize and regulate online gambling.

Speaking of ENGLAND, they’re getting on the charity poker kick there, too, raising tens of thousands of pounds for kids with learning disabilities via a PARTYPOKER televised event.

In CONNECTICUT, they’re using poker to send Pee Wee baseball players to COOPERSTOWN.

PHIL HELLMUTH is breaking new ground in non-pokery poker marketing … having just signed an ENDORSEMENT DEAL with an energy drink called “Pro Player.”

Could ENERGY DRINKS be the next poker? They’re exploding like online poker rooms in 2005, and there’s too much unregulated profit margin in these arguably addictive chemical products (that teens love!) for the Feds not to eventually take note/want their cut.

It’s been way too long since I’ve done an Instapoker. Please bear with me as I delete emails and close down a random assortment of open tabs in my browser:

An interesting site about high-stakes online play.

IGGY is back posting at Guinness and Poker. Good for him … that’s where he belongs. Of course he should know that no one will believe word of his “retirement” ever again.

Another site that previously disappeared has since transmogrified … WPBT headquarters. (World Poker Blogger Tour, for those who don’t know.) Not sure who’s behind the new WIKI or where they’re going with it, but we’ll be clicking every once in a while to see what’s going on. (Go DOT-INFO!)

NETELLER is now pulling out of CANADA (where they are based) and TURKEY (which has arguably the toughest INTERNET POLICE FORCE out there.

Gambling 911 reports that there’s no record of Neteller funds seized by the United States. Disconcerting if true. A Neteller Customer Coalition has formed to, er, do something about it and/or at least have a place to bitch.

CHRIS FERGUSON’s boring table demeanor:

It supposedly SNOWED in LAS VEGAS yesterday.

And that comes just two weeks after the purchase of a DISNEYLAND-size swath of land on the SOUTH STRIP to become the site of a monstrous pee-recycling environmentally friendly indoor water park and “snow dome”. Via some presumably stoked BRITISH SNOWBOARDERS.

American poker money is getting more expensive. ULTIMATE BET has altered its affiliate agreements for US players, subtracting for “overhead.” UB was kind enough to let inform its AFFILIATES three weeks after the policy went into effect:

March 13, 2007

Attention Affiliates… Regarding US Traffic Only!
Effective: Thursday, February 22, 2007

UltimateBet is still holding a strong position in the U.S. market providing poker players from around the world with the very best online poker experience. We are 100% committed to staying in the U.S. and provide your players with the easiest, fastest, secure deposit and cashout options. However, in light of Neteller and other popular ewallets leaving the U.S., our processing fees have increased upwards of 5 times. These costs are higher due to the new and only deposit options available to U.S. customers, some of these deposit options also require UltimateBet to cash guarantee all funds – please note we keep a cash reserve to cover all of our player balances.

Due to this increase in costs, UltimateBet has amended its terms and conditions so we can stay in business to enable you and Ultimate Bet to keep making money and not be forced to leave the US market.

Calculation of Net Revenue has been amended to reflect the following:

All Affiliates are paid on net revenue. Net revenue is calulated by taking the gross revenue an affiliate’s player generates and subtracting any processing fees which can include:
Merchant processing fees;
Charge backs;
Processor default;
Tourney deductions;
Any other agreed upon deductions.
The amount of these deductions will be taken off of Gross Revenue. At that point the remaining number is considered the Net Revenue. You, the affiliate, will be paid based on this net revenue number.

Please see the example below:

Gross Revenue generated by the affiliate’s U.S. players.
Minus Processing Fees.
Minus tourney deductions and any other agreed upon deductions.
= Net Revenue.
You, the affiliate, are then paid their RevShare on this net revenue.

Last, we will combine your U.S . commission with your Non-U.S. commission for your total payment.
UltimateBet has the most competitive merchant processing in the industry – i.e. your customers will be able to deposit and cashout better with UltimateBet than any of our competitors – this means higher customer lifetime values and bigger checks for you that will continue!

By staying in the U.S., UltimateBet is making the commitment to allow you to continue to make money!

Your non-U.S. traffic will not be included in these changes. This is only for U.S. traffic.

Effective: Thursday, February 22nd!

Should you have any questions or concerns, please do not hesitate to contact us!

The UltimateBet Team

Speaking of ULTIMATE BET, I think this is the kind of questionable appropriation of the WSOP LOGO that HARRAH’S says it will frown upon vigorously be trying to stop:

(Note: No offense to MEAN GENE, who is just doing his job.)

Speaking of jobs, PAULY, OTIS, and the SHRINK are kickin’ it in MONTE CARLO.

And Pauly has an awesome interview with the hip-hoppinest PROFESSIONAL KENO PLAYER, who happens to be from TEXAS.

There’s more stuff going on, of course … but I think that’s good for now.

About a million major poker developments have taken place over the past couple weeks … but before we get to those, there are some important links out there that I have been neglectful in sharing:

First off, check out RawVegas.tv … a great new “I-TV” channel put together by CHOPS (from Wicked Chops) and BRIAN BALSBAUGH of Poker Royalty.

Poker is just a small part of it all, really … but on this week’s episode of “Prop Bets,” JOE SEBOK takes GAVIN SMITH for $3,000 by eating an extra half of a fajita, and DANIEL NEGREANU now keeps his videoblog there, too, where you can see him do things like shave his head.

MICHAEL CRAIG has amicably parted ways with the festive gang at PokerWorks — he can probably feel pretty good knowing that it essentially took nine top-quality bloggers to replace him. He’s now blogging for Full Tilt.

Poker author JAY GREENSPAN has gone indie with his new blog, Annals of a Fish Hunter. Read his first post on how it’s a bad time to launch a new poker blog and you’ll be hooked.

Speaking of new blogs, the venerable POKER SHRINK is back to blogging. I always enjoy Dr. Tim Lavalli’s neurological analyses of poker, but have missed the unfiltered rants and insights that made him the most prolific poster over at our beloved-but-dormant PokerBlog.

Over at Up for Poker, CJ has blog-ficially changed his name to LUCKBOX, and apparently has begun thinking about life beyond The Hammer … with some fresh and familiar faces bringing us a new sports blog and Hollywood blog. Doesn’t he know sports is just a fad?

And speaking of Up for Poker … if you haven’t read it already, check out “The Last Poker Game” by OTIS … as he turns his adventures in the Carolina underground into some of the best, most colorful poker writing we’ve seen in long time. Think secret lovechild of ERNEST HEMINGWAY and ANDY GLAZER. Can only wonder what these two mighta produced had either one of them stuck around long enough to start a blog.

UPDATE: PokerBlog alum Jen Leo got herself a presumably sweet new net-geeky gig — writing the Daily Deals travel blog for the L.A. TIMES.

Perhaps her crossover into mainstream media has inspired others? I got no fewer than six LINKEDIN invitations today from bloggers. Never thought I would have so many friends contemplating the concept of a “job.”

It’s snowing outside. If you don’t mind, please bear with me as we shut down about 30 open Firefox tabs that Pokerati has accumulated over the past few days.

First off, happy February 14. If you do a Yahoo! or Google image search for “valentine poker” (quotes excluded) here’s the first thing you see:

HOLLAND has officially legalized online poker, licensing the game to its government-run land-based casino. This development comes shortly after a round of raids on AMSTERDAM home games. (See the connection?)

UTAH has no intentions of legalizing gambling, but the state did amend some recent legislation to ensure that AMATEUR TEXAS HOLD’EM is allowed in bars.

Meanwhile, WYOMING is one step closer to legalizing “social” cash games in bars and restaurants, though big tourney action may still be outlawed.

A lot’s going down in MACAU, which apparently generated more gambling revenue than LAS VEGAS in 2006. This sorta expansion has Virgin pioneer RICHARD BRANSON putting a few billion into the Asian gambling pot.

But Chinese casino mogul STANLEY HO isn’t gonna let the round-eyes gank all his action.

JOHNNY CHAN has plans to eventually open shop in Macau (and elsewhere) — has partnered with the makers of The Block to create “the world’s first poker hotel.” Tourney director extraordinaire MATT SAVAGE is part of his team — we can only hope this doesn’t mean all of China will be taught to do the flop one card at a time.

Here’s a pokery valentine, from CUBA:

Speaking of communism, you probably have heard by now that the US ATTORNEY’S OFFICE has seized $55 million worth of Neteller funds as evidence.

About $520 of that belongs to yours truly. I suppose that makes me COLLATERAL DAMAGE in the [tag]War on Poker[/tag]:

Here is what Neteller has to say about how and when we will get our money.

Amy and the Shrink have an update on the investigation into a seriously BOTCHED COLOR-UP during last year’s WSOP main event.

It coincides with news that HERSHEY’S has been named the Official Chocolate of the 2007 WSOP. Mmmm, two million extra chocolate chips!

POKERTEK, makers of dealerless electronic poker tables, is being sued by TELLIS, a TEXAS-based software company that doesn’t even have a website.

Haley continues to investigate the legal battles between HARRAH’S and FREDERIC SCHIAVO over the rights to WSOP.COM.

This valentine from PKR.com suggests that while a man’s hand may seem stronger than a woman’s … it’s still possible that she’s holding the nuts:

UPDATE: Just re-watched the vid, and the lady actually would need some help on the turn to make her straight-flush.

Did you know the proportion of WOMEN PLAYING POKER continues to grow? The XX-chromosome set reportedly represents 30 percent of online players now.

BRANDI HAWBAKER, cute-as-pie poker girl and Full Tilt nipple-cover model, has reportedly found a new way to fund her bankroll by stripping at SPEARMINT RHINO. (Congrats on the new sponsorship deal!)

Remember, on February 14 and forever …

Trying to clean up the place for a few new bloggers has left so much poker news passing us by. So in no particular order of importance, you might be curious to know:

CHARLES BARKLEY had a good weekend in Las Vegas, pocketing $700k on mostly blackjack. No word on where he played or how much he was betting per hand.

The first WSOP poker-bloggy marriage is set to go down, between the “all over the place!” JEN LEO and Stone Temple Pilots roadie-cum-PokerNews editor JOHN CALDWELL. Word spread via AMY C … should make for a festive Day 1B of the WSOP main event.

JAMIE GOLD has settled his case with CRISPIN LEYSER — no more lawsuit for the $6 mil … they’re gonna chop the pot instead. We’ll try to find out for how much, but clearly neither was going to win at this point, and any two SEMI-SERIOUS poker players can see the folly of letting LAWYERS take such a high rake in a heads-up match.

There’s an interesting tournament going on at THE BIKE … the $10,000 Poker Netcast HEADS-UP CHALLENGE. GAVIN SMITH sucked out hard on CLONIE (J7 vs AJ — 7 on the turn, 7 on the river) to knock her out.

Hey, check it out … a new generation of NEGREANU FANS are being bred educated at CANADIAN universities.

Despite CALVIN AYRE’s semi-fugitive status in the US, the COSTA RICAN billionaire is fixin’ to bring BODOG to AMERICAN TV starting next week.

By the way, what does the United States National SOCCER TEAM love to do while traveling? They play poker. (Or shall we say Pele poker?)

A PENNSYLVANIA JURY decides it’s not right to bust out of a poker game and return to shoot people. Duly noted.

THE WSOP CIRCUIT main event is underway in COUNCIL BLUFFS, IOWA. Pokerati finds it interesting that the WSOP in (what is essentially) OMAHA has no Omaha.

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You’ve heard it here before (and will hear it again) … 2007 is all about RESPONSIBLE GAMBLING. Some worldwide initiatives are taking shape, though the US, of course, has opted to have no say in the matter.

Note to self: WIN MORE. Lose less.

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An interesting outline for HOW TO TAX online gambling from our good friends in HUNGARY. Summation: Take 30 percent.

Not surprisingly, LAWYERS with expertise in gambling are a hot commodity these days.

And anti-online gambling laws aren’t stopping Americans from trying to gamble online. Just ask SCANSAFE, a company that blocks employees of other companies from pissing off online while at work. (Looking at Karridy.)

COLLEGE KIDS at SYRACUSE are saying the same thing … they can’t be stopped!

But here’s a good article that looks into the hard-number connections between online gambling and TERRORISM.

The LA TIMES has a good op-ed on the ridiculousness of preventing wagers on the SUPER BOWL — more than $5 BILLION slipped through unchecked hands untaxed, experts say.

And here’s a quick little item that shows how/why US ATTORNEYS are trying to draw a connection between online betting and Al Qaeda-suited.

That should be enough for now. But as always, there’s more TK.

Oh, wait, almost forgot … Starting tomorrow, you are supposed to BOYCOTT online poker through SUNDAY. Oh, wait, no you’re not.

Good morning. I’m not used to being up this early after a full night’s sleep … so let’s get to poker:

They’re down to 18 at the WPT’s WORLD POKER OPEN @ the Goldstrike in TUNICA. “The Catfish” is in the lead, followed by JC TRAN, DANIEL NEGREANU, AMIR VAHEDI and others.

In LONDON, they’re halfway through the INTERNATIONAL CASINO EXHIBITION, where 25,000 poker-bizzer types are contemplating a not-so-American gambling future.

Here’s some good discussion from a British STOCK FORUM about the big dip PARTYGAMING’S stock just took. A lotta mixed reactions. The Motley Fool has more on PRTY.L as well.

Something you may have missed but still worthwhile … the CC Times’ top 10 people of they year. BILL FRIST takes the crown, while other notables include JEFFREY POLLACK, CRISPIN LEYSER, PAMELA ANDERSON, and gaming CEO’s MITCH GARBER and DAVID CARRUTHERS.

Prosecutors in ALABAMA are promising a hardcore crackdown on poker rooms and the like after some recent court rulings. Still waiting word from TUSCALOOSA JOHNNY on whether or not he’s scared.

Speaking of court, WOODY the Pokerati commenter is at trial today, as in right now, in DALLAS for his involvement in the GOOD FELLOW’S raid. He’s pled NOT GUILTY, and the TRAFFIC COURT hearing his case isn’t used to having SWAT TEAMS testify.

Back across the pokery pond, at least one writer has figured out that the new buzz about GAMBLING ADDICTION in the UK has little to do with medicine and more about doctor-types looking to cash in on the “CRAZE.”

And hey, it’s WEDNESDAY, so don’t forget to tune in to Hold’em Radio at 7 pm central tonight for “Beyond the Table,” where we should have a very interesting discussion with BRIAN BALSBAUGH — the Gonz lover most important guy in poker who doesn’t know how to play the game.

It’s official … my online gambling days are done, at least for a little while. I tried to deposit some more money into ULTIMATE BET, but to no avail (despite following instructions and agreeing to an extra fee). Even if someone could walk me through it, it’s simply too difficult for this not-quite-winning online player to go through the hassle.

UPDATE: CardPlayer reports that online tourney fields took a sharp hit this weekend. Expect those numbers to further dwindle as WEAKER PLAYERS exhaust available bankroll.

Read into that what you will. Here’s the latest update on how you can still deposit (and redeposit) to your various online gambling accounts.

And here’s a tech site reporting on the reporting that alternative methods still exist (at least for now) and concluding that online gambling still ain’t goin’ away.

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But the bona fide CRACKDOWN on online gambling (and therefore poker) continues. The latest step by our AMERIFEDS is subpoenaing foreign bank records. Whether this info would be used for information or prosecution is yet to be determined, but we can bet the request alone will be enough to pique some of our neighbors who don’t like the idea of the US CLAIMING JURSIDICTION over the world/money.

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More influential NON-POKER sites are taking note of developments in our little pokery corner of the internet. They may not know what to make of it all yet, but they seem to recognize its far-reaching relevance.

So far, the NETELLER news has inspired SLASHDOT readers to post 579 comments.

It took less than a few days after the most recent blow to legitimate online poker sites for SPAM from the criminally minded, fly-by-night operations to arrive. Below is an example of a site that for obvious reasons shouldn’t even be considered a viable alternative:

—–Original Message—–
From: Ian Hardin [mailto:allenipbo@tftdisplays.com]
Sent: Sunday, January 21, 2007 7:49 PM
To: danm
Subject: US players are welcome

hi
(download), start playing
US players are welcome
most fair casino
you don’t know internet at all if you don’t know this casino

http://greatdefisha.org

Go ahead and click the site (assuming you feel good about your SPYWARE/VIRUS protection) … I did, and it wasn’t even operable yet.

The BRITS, we know, are all about online gambling. And one of the thing they’ll likely be doing with all that TAX REVENUE the UK gains — besides making sure their players can be confident they are dealing with a safe, fair, legitimate site — is helping doctors help the tiny (but still sizable) percentage of people who have true GAMBLING ADDICTIONS.

We can expect plenty of stories like this one to emerge — about a 53-year-old lady lawyer in CALIFORNIA who just got sentenced to NINE YEARS in prison for embezzling $900k to fund her internet gambling addiction. (I wonder how many of her tainted dollars got dispersed directly or indirectly into any of our online accounts.)

Some states in AMERICA are starting to realize that the new anti-gambling law doesn’t prohibit INTRAstate online play … and that could open the door … for something.

MICHAEL BOLCEREK (of the PPA) was in attendance at the NATIONAL CONFERENCE OF STATE LEGISLATURES last week, where talk of UIGEA enforcment was a hot topic, and he introduced elected officials to the concept of RESPONSIBLE GAMBLING.

Related to that concept, LOU KREIGER has a good post on when to leave a juicy game. He played in the Poker Authors Challenge at BINION’S yesterday. (No word on who won.)

But as it currently stands in the new legal environment, it’s not about who you play with or how you play. Just ask ANTHONY HALL, who has been warning our CARIBBEAN cousins for a year that an important industry to the region’s economy was being threatened by American politics and law enforcement.

Meanwhile, CRYPTOLOGIC — based in the same CANADA that is home to Neteller — has staked its claim in the yet-to-be-tapped CHINESE poker market.

Did you know the editor of POKERPAGES is also a stand-up comedian?

Not to be confused with the JUSTIN WEST who ran for Texas governor.

And speaking of Poker Pages, KAELAINE kicks it old-school and has a nice tourney recap of her victory in a MEDIA FREEROLL in TUNICA. What’s interesting about this quick-blind freeroll is that the field grew … and that the WORLD POKER OPEN folks now pay out a cash prize ($1,000) to the winner. (I’m pretty sure this is new.)

And speaking of OLD SCHOOL, I found this 2005 discussion about when online poker will peak both naive and prescient.

Likewise for this 2005 article in Time … declaring how the BRITS are leaving us way behind in the online gambling world … and giving a little more insight into the factors in play before the CRACKDOWN on poker really kicked in.

BEST POKER SHIRT ever? I gotta get me one of these. (Go Polacks! Go “the dan” circa 2004!)

Click here to see the worst.

All the legal hubbub hasn’t stopped DOYLE BRUNSON from spreading the poker gospel to Hollywood (via UTAH) with a charity tourney at the SUNDANCE FILM FESTIVAL.

Back in DALLAS, a charity called BEA’S KIDS held an old-fashioned charity tourney (c. 2004) this weekend … where players actually paid money to compete for real prizes … a big-screen TV, trip to Vegas, stuff like that. There was no police raid on the illegal/tax-deductible attempt to raise money to send poor kids to summer camp.

Speaking of kids … here are some more MUSICAL CHIPS:

Online legalities not withstanding, teenagers are the future of poker/doing the “chip dance.”

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UPDATE: GUTSHOT proprietor DEREK KELLY has decided to appeal the recent LONDON court ruling that declared (unregulated) poker clubs like his to be within the reach of British gambling laws. Pokerati loves the Gutshot. But can we say good luck?

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Click here to see poker-related teenage angst.

The wheels of poker keep on turnin’. Proud Mary keeps on burnin’ Let’s get right to the news that may or may not be important to you …

PARTYPOKER is moving and shaking with business deals to solidify its presence in ASIA.

INDIA is booming — clearly, it’s the next Czech Republic/Thailand/China/Tibet all rolled into one — and 34-year-old PartyPoker co-founder ANARUG DIKSHIT plays a significant role in this presumably hot emerging economy. (via Forbes)

Here is a video of PartyPoker big-whig BD GOEL leading a panel discussion at a conference for the Bollytech elite:
NOTE: The interesting stuff starts about four minutes in.

And here is a video of some dancing poker chips:

(via LazyDork.com)

Soccerati is one of my new favorite websites — awesome name, by the way — because there’s more to life than just poker, DAVID BECKHAM is coming to America, and I’ve been playing a lot of FIFA ’07 on the XBOX 360.Click here to see semi-naked pictures of his wife, VICTORIA, pka POSH SPICE. (Welcome to the United States!)

SEAN SALMON is my new favorite MIXED MARTIAL ARTIST. I just learned who he was yesterday last week, and on January 28 he’ll step into the UFC Octagon sporting Guinness-and-Fighting apparel.

Speaking of Indians … Sen. DAVID VITTER (R-Louisiana) wants to introduce legislation to limit campaign contributions from NATIVE AMERICAN TRIBES (the kind that run casinos and send money to TEXAS Republicans to keep the busloads of players coming).

Pokerati is monitoring PARTYGAMING STOCK these days, in part because we just purchased some, believing the company is primed for rebound. But PG co-founder VIKRANT BHARGAVA might see things differently, having just sold a majority of his stake for $100 million.

Meanwhile, the BRITS are cracking down on amateur PUB POKER. Wait, we thought the UK was poker’s biggest ally. Poker world still TOPSY-TURVY.

So here are some more dancing chips:

And this video reminds us we’re still waiting for a true RON CEY of poker to emerge:

In NOVA SCOTIA, authorities are warning bar owners that the ROYAL CANADIAN MOUNTED POLICE will come after them if they keep hosting Texas Hold’em tourneys. (Can’t tell if they are talking about no-money games, too.) The government-poker shakedown seems to be worldwide.

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HARRAH’S has released the event-by-event schedule for the 2007 WSOP.
More HORSE, a new “MIXED” HOLD’EM, and various designated WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS in play.

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Last year, police in SOUTH CAROLINA were raiding poker games. With trials still pending for 18 arrested players pleading not-guilty, Rep. WALLACE SCARBOROUGH (R-Charleston) is drafting legislation to legalize “recreational” poker games, in the state’s first major revision to its gambling laws in 200 years. (TEXANS, of course, should take note.)

The issue is near-and-dear to OTIS, who hails from the Cocks-loving state and points us to a quality story by BOB PAJICH at CardPlayer (Kudos Bob, and kudos CP, for all the real journalism poker’s mounting legal issues are bringing out in “The Poker Authority.” Refreshing!)

WEST VIRGINIA is also preparing for more-legal gambling, and declare INDIANA, MISSISSIPPI, LOUISIANA, and SOUTH DAKOTA as the models of regulation to follow.

Here’s a video showing the effects of drugs and alcohol on spiders in a way that may or may not apply to plenty of poker players:

Thanks, Tom, for the link!

OK, that’s probably enough for now.