I went into a bit of a breakeven stretch over the following four sessions. I have only myself to blame for this because I failed to use any sort of anti-jinx methodology. For example, say you send a tweet talking about how hard you’re crushing a game or how amazing you’ve been running at the tables. I usually don’t like to write such tweets because over 50 percent of the time they carry the jinx-virus, which will abruptly halt any and all rungood and stop it dead in its tracks. That being said, it is possible to tweet such thoughts to the twittersphere, but it would be foolish to do so without using anti-jinx protection. You’re simply putting yourself and your bankroll at risk without strapping on a hashtag along the lines of #plsdontjinxitkthx at the end of your happy tweets.

I don’t know why we call the poker gods, Gods, but we do. They seem more like a bunch of high school dropout, weird uncle, goofball idiots to me. When they abandon you, it is the filthiest, loneliest feeling you can imagine. But when they reflect their light on you for any kind of extended stretch, you feel, well, enlightened. Chosen. So in tune with everything you can hear the hum of the earth.

I somehow managed to sneak a $117 victory past the jinx-bouncers playing $1/$3NL at the Rio on the 1st of the month. But the next day when I ventured into the Palace of Caesar, his games of $1 and $3 were not so kind. I left @CLVPoker $400 lighter in the pocket, and followed that with a small $85 loss on the 3rd. My spirits were quickly risen on the very next day, which was a Thursday. Thursday evenings, as you should know by now, means Pokerati game night. The PLO/NL mixed game has treated me really well since its incarnation @PalmsPokerRm (#nojinxnojinxnojinx) and this particular Thursday brought happiness in the form of a $520 win, erasing losses from the previous two sessions. Unfortunately the breakeven stretch continued another day; on Friday I played a long, 10-hour session at the Rio dropping about $700 in frustrating fashion. Actually there was a pretty interesting hand from said session…

It was early on, and I had noticed that the middle-aged man with a WPT hat and a beer in his cup holder directly to my left was playing every hand, and raising almost all of them. He also had a lot of chips. I decided to switch seats after he stacked a player and was sitting across the table from him when I raised to $18 with KQ after 3 limps. There were three callers including WPT guy and I had position on everybody. The flop came 643, and WPT guy led for $20. I had seen him donk-lead like this with a flush draw in a previous hand and this situation felt very similar in that he could have some sort of a straight draw. It folds to me and I decide to call. The turn is a 3 and he leads for $50. It feels like a good card as it doesn’t seem to change too much, and if it hasn’t then I think a lot of the time I have the best hand. I call again. The river is an A, and WPT guy pauses for a while. He starts eyeing me and saying things like “Hmmm, that’s not a good card,” and is really taking his time. He eventually bets $220. I tank and say, “You could be bluffing with the best hand” and he laughs. I’ll post the results in the comments below later and if anyone wants to give input on all streets, please feel free.

The next day I demoted myself to $1/$2 and hit Planet Hollywood, which I keep in my regular repertoire of offices. The games are insanely soft, which is partly due to the fact that if you self-park upon arrival, you have to walk all the way through the Miracle Mile shops. It’s insane far, and as a result, most locals/regs/nits don’t bother playing there. Trying to valet is a gamble in itself; the attendants can be pretty meh. One of them even took my car key home with him at the end of his shift! I had to wait 20 minutes for him to drive it back to the casino. Arguably worth the wait, I booked a $465 win at PH and followed that up with a similar sized win at @RedRockPoker two days later, erasing the Rio debacle. Things were really looking up when my next session earned me $710 at the Palms the next day. And $430 two days later, followed by $515 the following day.

It was around this time that I realized what was happening. I don’t know why we call the poker gods, Gods, but we do. They seem more like a bunch of high school dropout, weird uncle, goofball idiots to me, but the community has dubbed them gods and who am I to question the community. Anyway, when the poker “gods” abandon you in that dark corner of the room, it is the filthiest, loneliest feeling you can imagine. But when they use their watch they stole from Walgreens to reflect the light of the sun on you, for any kind of extended stretch, you feel, well, enlightened. Chosen. You are in tune with everything around you and you can hear the hum of the earth.

Everything was flowing naturally. I would make plays that were always correct and opponents would make plays that would have me texting my friends to tell them about it, OMG. I flat a bet with the nut flush draw, someone behind me raises, I shove, he calls off with a worse flush draw. I raise 99 on the button, get three callers, flop 9-2-2, someone donk-ships all-in with a flush draw. A guy misreads his hand and shoves into my made flush. It’s the type of stuff you wish could just always exist, as all the stress of poker would just fall into nothingness. Before I knew it I had racked up 13 straight wins for one of, if not my longest win streak ever. Now, as far as the stakes go, it’s nothing whatsoever to brag about. This is low-stakes grinding at its finest and I haven’t stepped back up the ladder. (Side note, Matt Marafioti aka ADZ aka @adzizzy has currently racked up 20+ straight wins playing high stakes NL. Sigh…) But it’s a beautiful thing nonetheless and a pretty sweet upswing to pad the bankroll.

If only it could last forever. Today at Caesars I played in what could possibly be the best $1/$3 game I’ve played all year, and that’s saying a lot. But I must’ve felt a need to pay that dark corner a visit to get reacquainted. The very first hand, I donated $400 to a guy that definitely does not need it, 3-betting with AQ, barreling the flop and barreling all in on a blank turn. I somehow found a way to leave with $800 less than I walked in with, which secures my last few sessions as another breakeven stretch or small downswing. If I could mirror the last sequence and go on another 13-game win streak that’d be, um, nice, but that’s asking a bit much I suppose. And so the small-stakes ride continues.

Guided by the gods, of all people.

Harrah’s is moving forward on a plan to acquire Planet Hollywood. Harrah’s took over management of Planet Hollywood’s hotel operations and some of its restaurants and bars in January. Planet Hollywood continues to run its own casino, though Harrah’s has made it clear it wants eventually to own the entire operation. If successful, it would give the company control of all 126 acres on the east side of the Strip between Flamingo Road and Harmon Avenue. Adding PH’s 2,496 hotel rooms to Harrah’s inventory would give it nearly 23,000 rooms on or near the Strip.

Back in the day, you know, like 2007, rooms like these — with amazing views, foosball, and a bidet — were reserved for people willing to pay a few thousand a night or gamble with 10s of thousands. Now, as 2009 comes to a (bittersweet?) close, such suites are being given away for free to semi-famous YouTube bloggers who know a guy who knows a guy who once worked at Best Buy and sold stereo equipment to a previous high-roller with leftover comp points.

Economy prediction: Bargain luxe + favors will be hot in 2010, too.

Planet Hollywood, of course, earned the distinction for being the Worst Poker Room in Las Vegas in 2007 (according to Pokerati.com), and last month saw its poker room management removed in handcuffs — arrested for allegedly skimming money via fake Bad Beat and High Hand jackpots.

Thanks, Shrink, for the tip!

ALT HED: WSOP-Ho?

Headed your way for the weekend, was hoping at the last second to get your recommendations on 1) tournaments and 2) sushi places to take guest/client. As for tournaments, playing one Friday somewhere during the day, not sure where yet- thoughts? Used to play the Caesars noon $330, didn’t like it last time so thought I’d branch out.

A slightly embellished version of my response to The Antiscouse:

1) Tournaments (Friday day)

Venetian $150 nooner
7,500 starting chips and 30-minute levels. It’s actually a daily event that usually draws 75-or-so runners throughout the week, but on Fridays it has been running closer to 150 players with first-place payouts around $8k.

Since you don’t dig the Caesar’s $330, you might also wanna check out the Bellagio daily events, and if you’re willing to go up against a smaller field with fewer prize payouts, the Hard Rock is in the last few days of their inaugual MegaStacks series — where all the events have been turned into $340s.

For a complete and semi-regularly updated list of Las Vegas daily and weekly tournaments + special events, go here.

2) Sushi

Nobu (at Hard Rock) is my personal favorite. Tasty. Sexy. Fun.

Simon (at Palms Place) is also one of my favorite restaurants in town … though it’s not pure sushi … it’s like Asian fusion with homegrown American steaks and stuff, and it’s away from the casino, which may be more appealing to me than you and your client.

Sushi Roku in Caesar’s Forum Shoppes is great food … but the price-to-portions ratio makes you feel like you’re at more of a French restaurant, and the long walk through a shopping mall to get there may be unappealing to smokers.

The sneaky, ooh, wouldn’t have thought of that place … Koi at Planet Hollywood.

UPDATE: 143 runners at Venetian today — Tagg finished 22nd (18 got paid). Hopefully better results TK for sushi.

The concept is that Shaq takes on the best in the world at their own game(s). He’s got some sort of swimming contest set up with Michael Phelps, a tennis match vs. Serena Williams, boxing vs. Oscar de la Hoya, and he’s been taunting David Beckham on twitter claiming the (once) great soccerer can’t bend one past him in goal.

While the entire show seems to be athletic-based — there’s no challenge to Elton John for some dueling pianos, e.g. — poker seems to have slipped in there. (Props to Disney sibling ESPN?) According to @Phil_Hellmuth, he, Mike Matusow, Chris Ferguson, and Erick Lindgren are on set right now filming an episode that we can only presume is Shaq trying to beat the best at Texas Hold’em.

Not sure about the format, but gotta think Lindgren’s got the edge after all his experience on Face the Ace.

So I was a little surprised to get the numbers back from last week’s edition, where an item about Phil Hellmuth’s new website for his clothing line was the highest performer. Really? Yep … A decidedly non-pokery readership found the PokerBrat’s T-shirts and Pep Pills more intriguing than an MGM bar, a new gambling-themed wine, casino decor, and a corner of P-Ho where blackjack dealers wear lingerie:

From Thrillist:

Wear: PokerBrat Clothing
These surprisingly subtle tees come from the John McEnroe of poker, 11-time WSOP champ Phil Hellmuth, with highlights including “Poker Tree” (“grow that chip pile from a toothpick to a lumberyard”), and “Poker Skater”, harkening back to his U of Wisconsin transpo from barroom games back to his dorm. Less tastefully, Hellmuth also hawks books, DVDs, and “Go Heads-Up” energy pills, guaranteed to keep you at the table long enough to lose your subtle tee.
Check out shirts and more at PokerBrat.com

They really are some pretty cool shirts. But perhaps the scary thing is clicking through the site, where Hellmuth tries his hand at pokery grocery-store romance. Click below to read about a poker-bratty encounter with the woman who would later become his wife:

She still kicks along. A motorbike headlight comes into view
 and soon does a U-Turnand coughs to a stop next to her.

PHIL
 Need a lift?
 And she skates past him. He sputters after her.

PHIL
 Let me give you a lift.

KATHY
 I was having fun in there until you
 ruined it!

PHIL
 Sometimes I just...get lost in poker.
 Sometimes--

KATHY
 Sometimes you're just a big asshole? You
 left me standing in the dark, Phil, in
 the parking lot of a tavern I didn't
 wannabe at in the first place!
 That hits him.

PHIL
 I'm sorry. You drive.
 (hegets off the cycle)
 I'll skate. The rest of the way.

KATHY
 Don't bluff me.

PHIL
 (bluffing)
 I'm not bluffing you.

KATHY
 Yes you are.

PHIL
 No I'm not.

KATHY
 Good.
 And she runs the motorcycle to a start and roars off. He
 stands in the dark and stares at the disappearing taillight.
 Shocked, he walks a few confused circles in the middle of the
 empty country road. Looks at the skateboard in his hands.

PHIL
 Son of a bitch.
 He starts kicking along on her board, into the night.
 OMITTED50 50
 INT.
 KATHY'S APARTMENT - MUCH LATER THAT NIGHT51 51

KATHY opens the doorand is surprised to find a sweaty,
 scraped-up Phil, obviously a terrible skateboarder.

PHIL
 Wanted to make sure you got your
 skateboard back.
 She takes itand smiles at him, dishevelled...but charming.
 This guy IS relentless.

KATHY
 I don't like liking you.
 And she pulls him in for a kiss.

PHIL
 I don't like it that you don't like
 liking me. (kissing) But I get a feeling
 that you like it that I don't like it
 that you don't like liking me.

KATHY
 (laughing)
 Shut up.
 Now they're being watched by her Flaming Lipsposters as they
 pull off each other's shirts on her cheap couch. These are
 tough kids. Hungry. Lonely.

Airs January 2 on the Sci-Fi Channel.

ALT HED: Extra, Extra!

Click below for the episode descrip:

Episode #519:  “Vegas”
Written by: Robert Cooper
Directed by: Robert Cooper
Cast: Joe Flanigan, Robert Picardo, David Hewlett, Jason Momoa, Jewel Staite
Guest Stars: Steve Schirripa, Neil Jackson
Air Date:  January 2nd, 2008 (tbc)

Logline:

Detective John Sheppard attempts to solve a string of unusual murders in Las Vegas.

Synopsis:

Police find a desiccated corpse on a desert road outside Las Vegas, Nevada, the seventh victim of a bizarre serial killer.  Detective John Sheppard, called in to assist, is baffled by these murders.  Then a clue, traces of radiation found on the bodies, leads him to a strange looking man with super human attributes who easily evades capture.

Some time later, Sheppard is detained and driven to Area 51. There he meets Dr. Rodney McKay who reveals that the suspect is, in fact, an alien – a wraith – who feeds on human energy. What’s more, McKay and his team have traveled to Earth from the Pegasus Galaxy, by way of a stargate, to prevent this wraith from compromising the security of the planet. But so far, Sheppard is the only one who’s been able to get close to him.

Gold Medal
The Venetian

Great regular tourneys, Deep Stack Extravaganzas, plenty of all-but-the-highest-stakes action, bottled Fiji water, and maybe the escalator that dumps off drunkenly clad party girls coming out of Tao right in front of The V’s poker room make it far and away the favorite of this website’s readers/players/dealers.

official site / TPA

The separate tournament room really is cool, if not the best in town, and the comfortable multi-tiered cash game area never seems short of action appealing to the masses of big little-stakes players. Great freerolls for regular cash players, too.

official site / TPA

Still home to the biggest games in Vegas (in terms of buy-ins), thereby drawing the most pros and the players who want to challenge/sit near them. Everything Bellagio is always luxe, of course, and their regular $500 and $1k tourneys makes the chance to play for baller money an in-town constant.

official site / TPA

Honorable Mention
Binion’s

It’s the only poker room where I’ve personally witnessed a fellow player spitting on the floor, and maybe that’s part of its charm. Not the best blind structures, but the bang-for-your-buck buy-ins, generally large field sizes, and frequency of starting times (no matter when you show up, there’s bound to be a tourney starting soon) make their events delightfully challenging. Regular HORSE and Omaha tournaments, too.

official site / TPA

Second Tier
still in the Top 25 percent with reliably good action and comforts
The Wynn, The Orleans, Red Rock, MGM, The Mirage, Hard Rock, The Rio

Also-Rans
at least a few readers really dig these places for some reason or another
Mandalay Bay, Golden Nugget, Treasure Island, Planet Hollywood, Hooters

Anyhow, it’s starting to become clear to me … the Arizona Posse gets no respect. No wonder they are all so angry all the time.

The Chinese contingent of the Arizona Posse: (L to R) Robert Goldfarb, Jesse McGinty, Pat Poels, Nekpal Singh, and Tom Schneider.

They were playing $25-a-point (with royalties), which would grow to $50-a-point and then $100-a-point and then betting on drawing seven cards at random from the deck and making the best five-card hand. (I almost bought into that action. In fact, now that I think about it, getting 4:1 on $50 with no skill disadvantage … probably a mistake not to.) Learned a lot about playing Chinese from these guys. For example, I had no idea you could play five-handed with two decks, but you can! And when I questioned their use of non-Kem/Copag cards — they went with the more papery Bicycles — it was not because they were cheap, but because 100-percent plastic cards are a little too slick for optimal Chinese splays. Who knew!?!

(The AZ-Posse, that’s who.)

The Bellagio-like spread health-conscious buffet at Casa de Goldfarb.

Though I left before the game broke, McGinty seemed to be the guy to beat, as he was up a couple thousand dollars by 2 am.

CardPlayer’s non-embeddable video coverage of the event won by the Irish Italian guy above. Click to watch.

Click here to read the review I submitted to The Poker Atlas, in which I call this locale “my least favorite room in Vegas, if not anywhere.”

Click here to see the CardPlayerTV interview with Mizrachi that ignores the regular presence of horrible music/jackhammers in the background.

P.S. Wonder if my opinion would be different had two $60 tournaments (with re-entry permitted) and two 1/2 NLH sessions resulted in better than nearly $700 in losses.