Still, fancy lines aside … as something of a new guy in the attaching-blog-names-to-Nevada-tournaments racket, kinda cool to leave one’s mark at least in a small way on the fabric of licensed-and-regulated corporately overseen real-money Vegas.

Check it out … I suspect someone was playing at a casino and watching how the table-embedded auto-shufflers work when they thought: How awesome would it be if you could press a button, and instead of getting a new deck, you got snacks and cocktails? The new GameBar, from the not-quite-sueably named Playerati, features a hidden, refrigerated snack bar that serves up refreshments at the table. A much better way to get everyone a round of chilled Tuaca shots than waiting for cocktail service. Press the button again for the electronic poker dumbwaiter to retract until the next round.

Theoretically can also be used to serve up weapons and drugs. Load the thing with semi-automatic handguns, and never fear home-game robbery again, knowing that you can arm your table from your game’s hidden (refrigerated) weapons cache at a moment’s notice. Good place to hide the bank, too … not to mention little sandwiches.

Ask yourself why all tables don’t have secret refrigerated compartments at Playerati.com.

[h/t @alcanthang]

Last year, Peter Eastgate received a bit of an overlay for winning the main event … an EGM Green poker table — made from 100 percent environmentally righteous materials (valued at $5,000) by a company whose mission seems to be outfitting casinos with products that help it earn whatever bonus goes along with LEED certification. Eastgate got one of these tables last year as a gift, but he hasn’t opened it yet, and it’s being shipped back to the WSOP so the felt can be autographed (using non-toxic Sharpies?) and silent-auctioned off with proceeds going to a yet-to-be-determined Eastgate-favored charity.

Eric Hansel, EGM founder, will join reigning 2008 World Series of Poker Champion Peter Eastgate at the 2009 PokerPalooza WSOP History booth being held at Rio All-Suite Hotel and Casino Pavilion Convention Area.

Thursday, July 2nd 11am – 8:30pm, Friday, July 3rd 11am – 8:30pm, Saturday, July 4th 11am – 8:30pm and Sunday, July 5th 11am – 6pm

The Gaming Lifestyle Expo, the world’s largest poker show, returns bigger and better under a new brand and format. The inaugural “PokerPalooza” will provide the same access to poker and lifestyle exhibitors, but expand the focus on fun, social, and interactive elements.
Multiple WSOP champions are expected to be on hand signing autographs. There will be an expanded food court and signature “Bad Beat Bar” to swap stories after being eliminated from poker’s biggest event.
Eastgate, after winning $9.2 million dollars has decided to share his wealth by donating the Eco-Green poker table Eric Hansel donated to him for winning the 2008 Championship Event. Eastgate is hosting a silent auction at the WSOP History Booth B 115 and the proceeds will go to Peters’ favorite charity to be announced at the Poker Palooza. Other poker stars autographs will also grace the felt of this very unique and eco-friendly table.
Attendees will also have the opportunity to win an official 500 piece chip set of World Series of Poker Chips, encased in a black leather case also being donated by EGM Greens’ founder Eric Hansel
Applying sustainable design principles to poker tables and other casino products can significantly reduce volumes of waste and decrease use of natural resources and lower impacts on ecosystems. Your patrons will appreciate your use of eco-friendly products right at your point of sale. For additional information on becoming ECO friendly visit www.egmgreen.com We are the future of Green Gaming.

A good reminder for people who spend a lot of time staring at the river: dontbebroke.com.

Hey Dan,

So some friends and I are going to throw a poker tournament in February here in Dallas as a fundraiser for a theater production company that we started this fall (www.UpstartTheater.com). Blue Mesa Grill is going to host the games (free appetizers and happy-hour-priced drinks) and we are going to have a $20 per player donation buyin with rebuys. I was wondering if you had any advice/suggestions:

– How often should we up the blinds so that a game starting around 3 on a Sunday will be over by 8 or 9 at the latest?
– Do you know any poker company/group willing to lend/donate us enough chips and cards for 100 people or so?
– Do you know any poker company/group that would be interested in donating a prize?
– Do you know any poker company/group that would be interested in financially sponsoring the event (we’re tax deductible) in exchange for publicity on our event fliers, website, and performance playbills?
– Do you know ways to publicize this to the Dallas poker-playing community?
– Anything else you think would be helpful?

thanks a lot,
Nick

Nick, as always, good to hear from you. One of these days you will find purpose in your life and ditch the restaurant-service/medical-technology career combo, as well as your passion for the arts and philanthropy, to discover your true calling as a poker blogger. Either that, or you are clearly nothing without Markus and Andy.

In the meantime, click below for answers to your questions:

– How often should we up the blinds so that a game starting around 3 on a Sunday will be over by 8 or 9 at the latest?

You probably want 20-minute blinds. That gives you roughly 15 levels to work with. Generally, the best tournaments start off slow to give everyone play, pick up some blind pressure in the middle, and then slow down to bring skill back into when the money counts. But this will be a charity tournament, so you’ll want to facilitate rebuys. Don’t start with an insultingly low stack, but maybe like 3,000 or 3,600 with blinds starting at 25/50. Also, in addition to rebuys, be sure to offer an “add-on” … meaning anyone, no matter what their chip-stack, can pay an extra $20 for another initial buy-in’s worth of chips at the end of the rebuy period, which probably should come at the end of the 4th level.

(You know, I used to actually have different blind structures for different events posted on this site. But i can’t for the life of me find them … kinda like your posts from back in 2005!)

– Do you know any poker company/group willing to lend/donate us enough chips and cards for 100 people or so?

Sadly, I do not. The poker biz is full of greedy bastards, and most are hurting for money moreso than back in ’06. At the same time, you may find some group that used to throw big events but no longer does that has a bunch of extra poker gear lying around. (If any Pokeratizens can help on this, speak up!) I also recommend contacting karridy – at – gmail dot com for tables.

– Do you know any poker company/group that would be interested in donating a prize?

Sadler & Carter have helped out with some prizes in the past. And they always had good gear. Bluff Magazine has donated subscriptions … that’s always a nice throw-in … top 3 get subscriptions to Bluff or something like that. And, of course, you could always hit up The Lodge for lapdance coupons.

– Do you know any poker company/group that would be interested in financially sponsoring the event (we’re tax deductible) in exchange for publicity on our event fliers, website, and performance playbills?

Ha ha, too funny. You said “financially sponsoring”! You know, it occurs to me that this isn’t a charity event — it’s just a fundraiser for the arts. (How are you tax-deductible?) That makes it more difficult to get help, because while poker players love to say they’re helping a good cause, few of them have read any Samuel Beckett.

However, there’s always an interest by those in the poker biz to reach poker players. And with that in mind, I would try hitting up Choctaw in Oklahoma for flyer sponsorship. WinStar’s good, too, but I suspect you’re too small for them to give you the time of day.

– Do you know ways to publicize this to the Dallas poker-playing community?
Yes, you should send an email to danm – at – pokerati dot com. If you get lucky, he may actually answer it. You also should probably take out a big ad on Pokerati. In the alternative, the guys over at BigStack.com (formerly Weston Poker) are nice dudes always looking for some good low-stakes action.

– Anything else you think would be helpful?

Good luck! I look forward to seeing coverage of the event on YouTube … and I’m sure everyone playing would too.

Oh, also, pack heat in case the Dallas Poker Bandits show up. I’ll vouch that you’re a good shot!

Jay Busbee (from Bluff) has a good State of the Poker Union address on ESPN.com, where he officially declares the poker boom dead. Also interesting to see ESPN, for the first time I remember in a long-long while, running (non-affiliate) PokerStars ads. [ESPN.com]

Poker Shrink Cranky Olde Coot has a good post wondering why FIDPA still hasn’t made the “new rules” they’ve long ballyhooed public. [PokerBlog.com]

Full Disclosure: FIDPA is one of my MySpace friends. [MySpace.com]

Liberal columnist Michael Kinsley shares a story about John McCain going on some extremely unpresidential tilt at the craps table. (The TJ Cloutier of Politics? Tons of success, a sometimes dangerous love of craps, and never quite able to win the Big One?) [The Daily Beast, via Huffington Post, via Short-Stacked Shamus]

Beyond the Table has a new home online. [Podcast.com]

I think Dr. Pauly’s starting to get a little miffed at me for not working out some production kinks and posting our re-constituted incarnation of Tao of Pokerati, but I think I can make him feel better by simply reading his blog. [Tao of Poker]

With all the talk of what really goes into a world-record endurance poker session, I forgot to send y’all to live-forum coverage of The Poker Den 3 — PartyPoker’s 36-hour high-stakes televised cash game. [MatchroomPoker.com]

Dutch Boyd apparently bought Steve Hall’s Pokerfolio in a semi-hostile takeover. Poor Steve … but he has found a new home for his poker updates/pictures of attractive Asian female dealers. [Pokerfolio.Spruz.com]

Also, the X-10 electronic table — a knock-off of the PokerTek PokerPro popping up in so many places — sharing the same name as a hidden camera used by so many pervy peeping toms before a few lawsuits encouraged them to re-market themselves as a security device. [SlipperyBrick.com]

And long overdue, here’s a great tale of a totally degenerate poker blogger/gambler rescuing his bankroll by poetically chasing/hitting the Station Casinos bad-beat jackpot. [TheTrooper97, via Up for Poker]

There’s more, too, coagulating in my bookmarks and inbox. News stories, forum threads, tourney results … Who knows … maybe I’ll get to them for your reading pleasure, but as is always the case from Head Slacker at this Little-Ole Poker Blog, no promises. It’s good to be back with you all.

LATE ADDITIONS:

Lacey Jones is getting ready for her co-hosting duties of Real Deal, the pokery interactive musical at The Venetian, which kicks off next week. [PokerListings.com via LasVegasAdvisor.com]

She also hosted an interesting event at Cathouse (as simply Lacey J) where women showed up for a seductive-attire contest where the winner got a boob job. [Photobucket.com]

Meanwhile, there was a hardcore SWAT-team poker raid in Fayetteville, NC. A firsthand account as well as some non-poker media coverage here and here. [Triangle Poker Journal]

I received one of the first production models of the new ShuffleTech shuffler a couple of weeks ago. I loaned them the use of one of our poker tables for the WSOP Gaming Life Expo, so that put me near the top of the list for production models. In the interest of full disclosure, I am a distributor for ShuffleTech. You can be the judge about whether this is a fair review or not, but I’ll try not to pull any punches.

I’m attaching a photos that I shot with my cell phone camera that shows the shuffler installed in one of my poker tables. As you can see, it is mounted with a flush mount kit so that the top of the shuffler is flush with the top of the felt. The shuffler can also be operated as a stand-alone unit on a table. In that case, you can choose to either insert and remove the cards from the top of the unit, or you can flip a switch and the cards will eject out the side of the unit.

The top of the unit has two buttons on the left side and a green/red LED. There is also a clear plastic door that opens to permit the insertion and removal of the deck of cards. The buttons select how many times you want the deck shuffled, 3 or 7. The green light tells you when the shuffler is ready to go. The rest of the machine resides below the table. The shuffler connects to a DC power brick, which provides the proper voltage to run the machine.

Operating the shuffler is simple. Inside the unit there is a tray in the middle that moves vertically during shuffler operation. After opening the lid by pressing down on it, you place the deck on the tray, close the lid, then press the 3 or 7 button. The first operation is a riffle, so the shuffler cuts half the deck to one side tray, then the other half of the deck to the tray on the opposite side of the machine. The vertical tray lowers itself to the bottom of the machine, then little wheels spin on both sides of the machine, riffling the cards back into the center tray. After all cards are returned to the tray, the tray returns to the top position for the next operation.

Pressing the 3 button causes the shuffler to riffle the deck twice, strip it once, and then riffle it one final time. Remove the deck, cut the cards for good measure, and you’re all set. Press the 7 button and the shuffler riffles and strips it a lot more. I would assume it riffles 7 times and strips it once or twice, but honestly, I didn’t keep count. Obviously, the 7 setting takes longer to shuffle the cards than the 3.

We used the shuffler in our regular game the day after it arrived. Our regular game is typically an 8- or 9-person NLHE SNG that usually lasts a few hours, followed by a few more hours of low-limit NLHE. We typically have two decks working, one deck in play and the other being shuffled by the player on the button, which is kind of a pain if a player is shuffling while playing.

The main advantage of the shuffler is that it definitely made for quicker play at the table, and it made the game more enjoyable for everyone since nobody had to shuffle the deck. One guy in the “dealer” seat was responsible for operating the shuffler, which was no big deal. The flush mount kit worked well; we didn’t have any cards get stuck on or around the shuffler, which is smoother/slicker than the felt itself. In our SNG, we typically play 20 minute rounds. When hand shuffling ,we are lucky (especially in the lower blinds levels) if the table completes a full orbit in a round. After installing the ShuffleTech shuffler, we were easily making at least one orbit per round or more. If I were running a card room, the ROI on one of these shufflers would be calculated in days, if not hours. One more plus is that it looks cool in the poker table.

In operation, the shuffler worked nearly flawlessly all night. We had a card get hung up once inside the unit in about 5 hours of constant play and use. Removing the card from one of the side trays in the machine was done easily by hand and the card re-inserted in the deck. That compares favorably with ShufleMasters that I’ve sat next to in use in casino poker rooms, and certainly was better than hand shuffling.

ShuffleTech recommends using Copag’s poker-sized cards with the shuffler and sends a new double-deck of Copag acetate cards with every shuffler. I ran the new cards through on both the 3 and 7 settings. A brand new deck of cards is best run through on 7 for the first time or two, but after that (and especially with a wash before inserting the used deck into the shuffler and a cut after retrieving it and before dealing it), I felt like using the 3 setting was sufficiently randomizing the cards. For testing purposes, I also ran both Copag bridge-sized cards and Dal Negro poker-sized cards through the shuffler, and both worked just fine. The bridge-sized cards were a little sloppier since they are narrower than poker-sized cards and the trays are all sized to use poker-size cards. Unless you’re really wedded to using bridge-size cards for some reason, it would be better to use poker-sized cards with this shuffler.

The main disadvantage of the shuffler is that it is not silent. It’s hard to compare it with a ShuffleMaster shuffler like the ones they use at the casinos because the ambient noise levels in a casino poker room and my poker room at home are completely different. But I’ve sat at the 9 position at enough casino tables — right in front of a ShuffleMaster shuffler — to note that the ShuffleMaster seems to make very little noise. That is not the case with the ShuffleTech shuffler. It isn’t loud, but it isn’t quiet, either. You can definitely hear the shuffling going on inside the machine, but it doesn’t compare with the buzzsaw sound and crappy operation of the cheap battery-powered shuffler that you can buy at WalMart.

With their shuffler, the ShuffleTech guys have built a good product that does what it is advertised to do and does it well. It is compact, far more affordable than the competition, and is easily installed in the poker table. The guys at my game all really appreciated it and felt like it kicked the game up a notch. For a first effort from a brand new company, the ShuffleTech shuffler is a solid base hit.

There are a lot of chips , tables, fancy custom tables and chips and tables for sale, of course, and for $15 a made-for-TV WPT video game. WSOP: Tournament of Champions for the Playstation goes for $8

For $150k you can have documentary footage of the rise and fall of Jamie Gold.

A WSOP baby’s blanket.

More chips, from the Aladdin, and from the Atlantic City Playboy Club. “Omaha Table” from Sante Fe Station.

Perhaps frighteningly, there are even poker bots for sale. At least one suspicious reader is questioning whether or not this is legal.

Remember seeing ads for 24/7poker shortly after the UIGEA? They have apparently gone out of business … and you can now pwn them for $25k.

Another defunct site wants $150k.

Poker domain names for sale for significantly less.

A new online poker room is looking for hot chicks to help them stand out among the better-established competitors at the WSOP.

And perhaps coincidentally, three presumably hot chicks have a room for WSOP players in a nice house for $200/wk.

Or for the same price, WSOP players can stay in this beautiful RV. Hey, if it could be parked in the Rio lot, might be tempting.

Or…

We are looking for 6 women age 18-25 for a cable/dvd reality show shooting in Vegas this summer. You will be living in an amazing house for two weeks along with 5 other girls and 6 guys. The show is a cross of World Series of Poker, Jackass, and The Real World. This is a cable/dvd show, it will be more “R” rated then most network shows (drinking, nudity, etc…)

PokerNews is looking for WSOP interns.

Rounder Magazine will also be at the WSOP … but they’re just looking for hotties.

A 37-year-old real estate broker-online college student-newbie poker pro sees sharing a Vegas high-rise with a model-like babe as a matter of good bankroll management.

One of the top play-chip players in the world/on MySpace — and he’s willing to sell his entire play-money bankroll for $800.

This guy is looking to sell real Full Tilt money, so he can pay his taxes. Kinda sums up the 2008 political debate about online poker, no? Would it or wouldn’t it be a better world if you could simply initiate a transfer on Full Tilt directly to “Uncle Sam”.

A guy is desperate for $300 — and thus is selling art, a poker table, and an ammo can.

Sweet stereo system, won in a poker game.

Hundreds and hundreds of baseballs, branded with Absolute Poker, in search of a good home.

Used poker books for sale.

Two pros seeking $20-200k worth of backing, just in time for the WSOP. This guy is looking for something similar, but for NBA betting.

A player wants a certain dealer.

A dealer wants a certain player.

Awesome …

ALL poker players are sore losers and the worst people and tokers (rude, no toking asswipe idiots)
I’ve been dealing 21 for a long time and every single time some idiot from the poker room finds his way to the pit there’s always a problem. They are all sore losers, rude to the dealers and the other players, shit tokers if they toke at all, and they always try and run all the shit they are allowed to do in the poker room past the 21 dealers. And they all do the most annoying thing known to man – every one of them shuffles their cheques…over…and over…and over again. Like it’s some badge of honor.

Listen up all you poker fucks – keep your rude, sore losing, no toking asses in the poker room where you belong. I’ve watched you assholes do little kid shit like spill drinks on purpose to get a new deck and bend the cards so they’re useless. You idiots should keep away from the pit. Oh yeah, and fuck you.

Awesomer …

Fat Slob – but very rich – seeks stunning knockout for Vegas Trip – 50

After suffering a bad beat at the tables, some like to shake off the tilt with a good-ole-fashioned gangbang. Others, when hitting a royal flush, want to celebrate with a bisexual threesome. And at least one “ultra high stakes amateur” (still) wants to have a baby.

Special use of the WSOP logo: “I am looking for a classy lady, wearing hot lingerie, heels and garter belt”.

Fun Female needed for a poker game. Nice tits a plus. Good Pay

Topless girls also needed just to pose on poker tables.

And this guy won’t charge you anything for his poker services … he’s just a lonely MWM looking for a way into the Batface home game.

Pettigrew Poker-not-dot-com, via cellphone-cam.

Before leaving Dallas, I traveled to West Fort Worth for the unveiling of a fancy new poker room — at the home of Good Chuck, one of the many good poker friends I’ve corrupted and left behind made in recent years. His family members had bought him a sparkling new handcrafted custom table, personalized casino chips, Kem cards … the whole luxury poker shebang … and to break it all in, the Pettigrew clan got together on the night before Christmas Eve for some tasty Texas barbecue and an inaugural $10+0 no-limit hold’em tourney. (Pokerati got exclusive coverage rights.)

It was a 14-player field comprised of serious amateurs and recreational kinfolk alike — with 4,000 starting chips, 15-minute levels, and a skill-friendly blind structure — enjoying good fun, intense competition, and some sibling rivalry to boot. For me, it was a chance to play with a cool new Kem color scheme and a salient reminder about the importance of the “little people” who make for good fleecing this game special.

The new table, from TiltBros, with a customized family felt.

Quite a step up from their old table, no?

Good Chuck (right) and two of his three sons — “Flaming Jake” (left) and Jeremiah (center).

Pokery pics of the kids and grandkids playing the game “PoPo” loves.

This family takes their poker seriously — and even posted a poker-room mission statement to keep dad off tilt remind all who play here what’s really at stake. You know, I gotta say, it’s pretty good — perhaps more poker rooms should think about something like this so players know more than just that “Check-and-raise is allowed”:

Our desire is to associate the game of poker to the game of life. To do this we will strive to make our play good examples of paitence, decision making, passion, and fellowship. We will promote a enviroment of class and fairness. Every player will be built up rather than brought down. Our goal is that every player feels peaceful and comfortable, and treats others with respect. We will never judge a player for religion, race, sexual orientation, or appearance. However, we will protect how we see fit all players from any verbal or physical attacks as well as any unfairness. As leaders we will try to lead lives of contentment, honor, integrity, and love for everyone. As players depart we hope their time with us improved their game of poker. But more importantly we desire players to depart with a better understanding of how to play the game of life.

This is not the house we were playing in … but it is the house across the street, which should give you some idea about where this rough-and-tumble tourney was taking place.

Chuck’s other son, Joshua (seen here with his wife to his left, and daughter on his lap), is a police officer in Shreveport, where thankfully he doesn’t have to put his life at risk busting up games like this one.

They even had a fancy tournament clock on a hi-def flat screen. Something must’ve been wrong with it, however, as it seems to be saying that I went out in 5th place even though I did. (Top 3 got paid; Jake would go on to beat his dad heads-up.)

It didn’t take long after players started getting eliminated for cash games to break out. Could we be looking at the next Kathy Liebert and Annette Obrestead? The future has to get its start somewhere … and right now these girls have a special fondness for the pink chips.