La N Dc
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!! Finally heading HOME! After 3wks of grinding I am happy and proud to say my Baby has successfully crawled his way into the 10k seat freeroll. Great job Baby, so proud of you!! We now have 2shots at 300k

For at least a few players, today is a day kinda like when high-school kids wait to get their college acceptance/rejection letters … waiting to see the final points tally to be official, so they know whether or not they qualified for the WSOP-Circuit National Championship — the $1 million freeroll that will kick off the 2011 WSOP.

Click here for the national leaderboard to see who’s got a seat for sure, and who looks likely as we wait for WSOP officials to turn orange squares into red

Team Pokerati’s La Sengphet is a lock (8th among non automatic qualifiers with 155 points, 2 rings, 7 cashes, $67k) … yay La! You go girl! … and, of course, she also won a non-points pendant for her 1st place finish in the WSOP-Caesars ladies event. And it looks like her other half, David Clark, also will make the cut but just barely (112.5 pts – 1 ring, 9 cashes, $59.5k) … DC made a final table in a non-ring PLO/8 event at WSOP-NOLA for good measure without the points … and he finishes just ahead of Steve Zolotow, who qualifies with the same point total, no rings, just 3 cashes, and $43k in earnings to give you an idea who got in at the bottom of the field.

At the very bottom, interestingly enough, with 100 points, is John Riordan, who won a ring and $210k in Florida. But he will not get a seat this year because he is not yet 21. Will be curious to see how the WSOP handles this case … will he simply get a rain check for when he comes of age? Because if so, when will we see bona fide WSOP-Teen events?!? You know, of course, that I am in the minority willing to admit that I think poker is good for kids.

Another late qualifier is longtime friend of Pokerati’s Josh Evans … who finished 3rd in the WSOP Southern Regional championship last week at Harrah’s New Orleans. Thrilled about that, as it gives us another excuse to re-run that highly acclaimed but not quite award-winning film we created about Josh as he got 6-figure deep in the ’07 main event:

[CORRECTION: Josh got 3rd in the WSOP-NOLA $1,600 main event ... which still gives him enough to qualify (140ish pts, 7 cashes $81k) but did not give him the guaranteed seat as just making a Regional Championship final table does.]

Sally Anne Boyer, 2007 WSOP Ladies’ World Champion, filed a suit Monday against Harrah’s and the WSOP Academy, claiming they’ve used her name and likeness without authorization, and falsely claiming she’s a graduate of the Academy.

Boyer contends that she only attended the first day of the two-day Ladies Academy event, never completing the course, so was not a graduate. Post Oak Productions, the company that produces the WSOP Academy produced an email from August 2007 from Boyer asking to mail a picture of her in ‘poker tournament attire’ to use for further promotions.

More details available from the Las Vegas Sun.

Abe Mosseri
Alex Kravchenko
Ali Eslami
Allen Cunningham
Allen Kessler
Amnon Filippi
Andy Black
Andy Bloch
Annie Duke
Bari Sklar
Barry Greenstein
Ben Lin
Bill Chen
Bill Gazes
Bradley Helm
Brandon Adams
Bruno Fitoussi
Chad Brown
Chau Giang
Chris Ferguson
Chris Reslock
Dan Harmetz
Daniel Negreanu
David Benyamine
David Chiu
David Grey
David Levi
David Oppenheim
David Singer
David Williams
Dewey Tomko
Doyle Brunson
Eli Elezra
Erick Lindgren
Farzad Bonyadi
Freddy Deeb
Gabe Kaplan
Greg ‘FBT’ Mueller
Greg Mascio
Greg Raymer
Gus Hansen
Hasan Habib
Howard Lederer
Huckleberry Seed
Isabelle Mercier
Jeffrey Lisandro
Jennifer Harman
Jim Bechtel
Joe Cassidy
John D’Agostino
John Hanson
John Hennigan
John Juanda
Johnny Chan
Justin Bonomo
Kenny Tran
Lyle Berman
Mark Gregorich
Matt Hawrilenko
Max Pescatori
Michael Mizrachi
Mickey Appleman
Mike Matusow
Mike Sexton
Mike Wattel
Minh Ly
Nick Schulman
Noah Jefferson
Pat Pezzin
Patrick Bueno
Patrik Antonius
Phil Hellmuth
Phil Ivey
Rafi Amit
Ralph Perry
Raymond Dehkharghani
Rob Hollink
Robert Mizrachi
Robert Williamson III
Roy Thung
Scotty Nguyen
Sherkhan Farnood
Soheil Shamseddin
Stephen Wolff
Steve Sung
Steve Zolotow
T.J. Cloutier
Tad Jurgens
Ted Forrest
Thomas Weideman
Thor Hansen
Tim Phan
Todd Brunson
Tom Schneider
Tony G
Toto Leonidas

Ariel Schneller
Bart Hanson
Bill Edler
Bob Feduniak
Carlos Mortensen
Charles Kaelin
Chip Reese
Chris Gentile
Cyndy Violette
Daniel Shak
Darrell Dicken
David Pham
David Sklansky
Erik Seidel
Gavin Smith
Harry Thomas
Jack Zwerner
James Owens
Jason Lester
Jeff King
Jerri Thomas
Jerrod Ankenman
Jesse Jones
Joe Tehan
John Cover
John Duthie
John Kabbaj
John Phan
Josh Arieh
Keith Lehr
Kirk Morrison
Kristy Gazes
Luke Neely
Marco Traniello
Mark Tenner
Mark Vos
Matt Lefkowitz
Maureen Feduniak
Meikle Partin
Neal Friets
Nick Frangos
Phil Laak
Q Knopow
Sam Farha
Sam Grizzle
Shih-Ping Sun
Ted Lawson
Tom Franklin
Tony Cousineau
Tuan Le
Victor Ramdin
Vladimir Troyanovskiy

The key word in that sentence, of course, is “gross.”

Eskimo Freezes
Paul “Eskimo” Clark was feeling pretty good about his hand on an Omaha board reading {K-?} {5-?} {6-?} {Q-?} — he was holding {A-?} {2-?} {7-?} {8-?} for the nut low draw and an up-and-down straight draw. But a cruel deuce on the river counterfeited his low, made him absolutely no straights, and his opponent scooped the pot. Horrified, Eskimo stared down at his cards for a while, unable to speak or move. This can be a harsh game sometimes.

Remind anyone of the mini-strokes he had last year? The time he collapsed at the table? The time paramedics had to come to the floor of the Amazon Room to check on Eskimo, but he refused to be taken out of the tournament?

When someone reports that the guy is unable to move or speak, ya gotta wonder if this is a bad sign. I’m sure Harrah’s has the paramedics on speed dial about now.

Take a little gander at Pauly’s Day 6 post called 2008 WSOP Day 6: Melting Eskimo’s Igloo and Erick Lindgren Wins First Bracelet. (The part about Lindgren’s bracelet is cool, but the Eskimo part is pertinent to this post. Focus, people.)

It’s actually the first time I’ve seen this episode — if that tells you anything about the immediacy or lack thereof attached to current WSOP broadcasts … and it prominently features/follows Jamie Gold. Pretty impressed with how ESPN handled his storyline, and Gold does a pretty good job explaining the Crispin Leyser lawsuit … well enough that I start empathize for just a moment until Norman Chad follows up with a reminder of why he may not have had many supporters regardless.

(About 2:00 in.)

I have a request for all poker players. Anyone that wants to complain at the WSOP 2008, please STAY HOME! I don’t care how much dead money you bring to the tables, I don’t want to hear the yakking when I’m taking a leak.

At the 2007 WSOP, bitching was the theme. Here are just a few of the complaints that I heard.

• Harrah’s is making too much money. Have you seen how much juice they are taking out?
• The food is horrible
• The dealers are making too many mistakes
• It’s cold
• It’s hot
• The lines are too long
• The structures are too fast, too slow, too medium
• The walk is too long to the tournament area
• There are too many tournaments
• The cocktail service is bad.

Is that enough or should I keep going?

Here are my thoughts:

Harrah’s is a business. I expect them to make money. I hope they make money or they might stop having the WSOP. If you don’t like the juice they charge, buy their stock and get excited about an increase in fees and attendance.

[Ed. Note: Harrah's stock is no longer available.]

I’m going to put the biggest complainer in Jeffret Pollack’s job and ask him what his first move is. I have an idea. Why don’t you propose a way to reduce Harrah’s bottom line by reducing the juice and providing free food for all. I hope you enjoyed your first and last day at work.

The biggest critics are usually the guys who have never had a real job. They can do everyone’s job better from the cocktail waitress to Pollack. They don’t appreciate the coordination it takes to have an event 2 months out of the year with temporary employees and temporary facilities. These guys have expectations that are completely unrealistic. I think that the WSOP keeps getting better every year.

• Tournaments start on time
• TV coverage is excellent
• We play in a nice facility
• They have got a players’ advisory committee, (bitch to these guys because they are representing you)
• They have more satellites to get into your favorite event.

[Ed. Note: Tom is now on that players' advisory committee, so technically you should be bitching to him.]

Do you remember back when the event was at Binion’s and Bobby Thompson would announce 600 names and seat assignments over a microphone that didn’t work while everyone was talking real loudly? The event started two hours late.

Rather than bitch this year, appreciate the fact that you’re playing and not dealing or serving Red Bull, because I can tell you it’s not fun. Maybe if all poker players went with a new attitude this year we could help change the attitudes of those who are serving us.

I say make the F-Bomb acceptable and implement a bitching penalty.

Via Wicked Chops:

Last month, she taught the WSOP Ladies Academy I attended, and we had several chances to speak about life and ladies-only tournaments.

On life, Annie changed hers drastically after the 2007 WSOP. She admitted that she didn’t feel so great after smoking and drinking tons of caffeine throughout the Series, so she just stopped. Cold turkey. She went smoke-free and caffeine-free in one day, and she switched to eating only organic foods. On top of that she began running – not just a mile or two but ten or twenty. When we spoke in January, she was up to nearly 20 miles at a time and preparing to run the Rock ‘n Roll Marathon on June 1st in San Diego. She’s going to challenge herself with the run while raising money for Ante Up for Africa.

Her comments on ladies-only events in poker went into my article on PokerWorks. As always with Annie, she doesn’t mince words or filter herself, which is something I admire.

Now, I’m going to think about her healthy ways while I put on my workout gear and eat some fruit light up and drink my caffeinated tea.

These are not special charity events, mind you — though he is s putting on some of those around the country, too — but just good-ole-fashioned come play me for cash, bitches, action … as can be seen below:

By the way, this announcement on the end of Montel TV comes perhaps coincidentally with the announcement of the Golden Nugget’s Grand Poker Series — which will feature several small buy-in events during the WSOP. Click here for more general Golden Nugget poker info.

I happen to be on the anti-ladies-only side of the debate, as demonstrated in this article on PokerWorks. When I took this stand during the 2007 WSOP by writing an article for PokerPages, specifically about the WSOP Ladies Championship bracelet event, I received some harsh criticism by women in the poker community, but I also received more support than anticipated – from men and women.

It’s an issue that won’t be resolved any time soon, as women continue to turn out in droves for the ladies-only tournaments, but it’s an interesting topic for discussion.

Click here to vote, preferably for Tom.

The Top 5 get the Espy honors. Currently the leaders are Randy Couture, Floyd Mayweather, Jr., Tom Brady, Alex Rodriguez, and Brett Favre … with Tiger Woods following just a single percentage point behind. Yikes, tough competition for Tom — dare I say tougher than any he has seen at the poker table? — but kinda cool that he’s (at the time of this posting) right ahead of Dirk Nowitzki and tied with Kaká.

Seriously, click on over … for the sake of poker players everywhere to further boost the ego of everyone’s second-favorite Beyond the Table cohost.

CORRECTION: Tom is ranked 96th overall for the past two years by Bluff. For 2007 he finished 158th, compared to 76th in 2006.

Here are some excerpts from what he sent, and my honest opinions:

My name is Ralph, and I am a very big fan of your book. I am an avid poker player who is hoping to become a professional in the distant future. I just wanted to commend you on authoring such a simple, yet brilliant book. It has reemphasized so much of the values that have already been instilled in my life, yet has reminded me so much of the important things that I have forgotten along the way. I just couldn’t put the book down.

Right away, you can tell that this young man has wonderful taste, and no, this is not a fictitious caller on Beyond the Table.

I was hoping you could pass along some winning wisdom to me if you had the time. I am 26 years old and graduated from college with a BA in Communications in January 2007. I have been unemployed during this time with the exception that I have been working part time for the past 7 years. I’m really struggling to find my place in the “real world” being that I don’t consider myself too business savvy, or intellectually smart.

First of all, most people who graduate from college don’t know anything about business when they get out. The good news for you is that you are being honest with yourself about where you stand, and maybe a little too hard on yourself. You might be surprised, but most people have great discomfort about entering the business world. I thought I was pretty smart after graduating and found out that I was a tiny, dumb fish in a huge pond. Fortunately for you, astute business people realize that recent college graduates aren’t very business savvy right away, so they are looking primarily for effort and attitude, moreso than keen business acumen.

The one thing you need to work on is your lack of confidence. You are competing against people who do think they know what they are doing, and they have immense, unwarranted confidence. When hiring young people, I looked for people who had confidence in their desire to deliver significant effort and someone who wouldn’t disturb my cohesive team. I didn’t want a know-it-all. However, get excited about what you do know. I took a job as a CFO for a public company with no experience filing SEC documents. A friend of mine gave me excellent advice. “Act like you deserve to be there, and show up with confidence. No one expects you to know everything.”

You say that you don’t consider yourself to be very intellectually smart. The one thing that all good players have in common is that they tend to be pretty darn smart. This could be a problem too if you really believe what you are saying.

I started playing poker 3 years ago and have gotten very serious in my studies and commitment to the game. It is really hard to develop a professional poker career here in the suburban community where I live. I make drives down to the Commerce, Bike, and local Indian casinos. But it is hard grinding it in small no-limit games trying to build a bankroll. I believe my skills are up to par, but being the local home game hero does nothing to improve my game. It’s hard enough trying to network with other real players who can help me develop. I had saved enough money to play one $1500 event at the 2007 WSOP and enough money on the side to play a few satellites. As fate would have it, nothing but bad beats and cold decks. I am realistic about my skills, not thinking I’m the best, but knowing I’m good enough to make it. I’m old fashioned, and I don’t like to play online. I’m willing to put in the time, and gain more experience playing live. I recognize that I have bad bankroll management issues as well.

You really said a lot in this last paragraph. What I heard was, “it’s really hard” a couple of times. First of all, none of this is hard, but it does take commitment and effort. Saying that is an excuse. Most every time I have had any success in my life, it took significant effort and perseverance, but I never said to myself “this is so hard”. That phrase should be stricken from your speech.

Really hard? How about hanging out in Iraq getting bullets fired at you every day with sand that’s been in parts of your body you didn’t know you had while your wife is back home screwing your best friend? The stuff you’re talking about isn’t hard, especially if you love it. At one time, I loved poker. I couldn’t get enough of it. I don’t think I could blame anyone or anything on my pursuit of becoming a professional player. I had a full time job (60 hours/week), a wife and two children. I had excuses but chose not to use them.

What is a professional player anyway and what should you expect from a career in poker? From my vantage point, many of the people that you might call professional aren’t even close. My definition of being a professional player is someone who supports themselves by deriving more than 51% of their annual income through playing poker, year after year. Rich people who travel the circuit playing poker, aren’t professional poker players, they’re lucky to be able to do that. Players who borrow money to stay in action and owe bunches of money for more than a few months aren’t professionals. Based upon what I believe, I think that there are only 100-200 professional live tournament poker players in the U.S.

The other concept that is important is that if your full time poker playing provides you less than 50% of what you could make in another profession, you are wasting your time. This all may seem very harsh, but the reality is, most poker players are not professional including those that you see on T.V. all the time. Bankroll management is the most important concept of being a professional and some guys that you know who have won many events on and off T.V. have gone broke many times. As a professional that should not happen. Ego gets in their way, playing way too high for the bankroll.

As the WSOP player of the year, we could say that I had one fantastic WSOP. Yes, but let’s look at the facts. I cashed for about $400,000. I spent about $130,000 (guessing because I’m on the road) in entry fees. I made $270,000…that’s it. It seems like a lot of money, but I had an unbelievable WSOP. I spent/lost $25,000 in Barcelona and $20,000 at Niagara Falls. This stuff adds up fast. I’m not complaining. I’m trying to paint reality.

You mentioned that you are grinding in small games. That’s what 99 percent of the successful poker players have done in their careers. Poker is a food chain. You must grind in these lower games until you can move up the food chain until you get so high that you become the food. You will know when this happens if you keep detailed records. Do you know what your hourly rate is in these games to the nearest $0.25? If not, you need to go back to the drawing board.

You mentioned that you played in a $1,500 tournament. How big was your bankroll when you did that? I’m guessing it wasn’t big enough to take that shot. Playing professionally means guarding your bankroll with your life. It is your biggest and most important asset.

Finally regarding this paragraph no more bad beat stories. I have heard them all. The pros I really respect don’t tell them. If you tell them, you haven’t been around poker long enough. Start acting and talking like a true professional. Bad beats happen just like you don’t always get exactly what you order at the drive-thru.

Now I’m back home looking for a career so that I can save enough to get married and start a family, and also fuel my ambitions to one day become a tournament pro (I’d prefer it over being a cash game grinder).

I hate to harp. Marriage and poker work very infrequently. Great poker marriages are rarer than successful Hollywood marriages. Why? Most spouses don’t understand and don’t want to understand why poker is not pure gambling. Long hours, lost money, unpredictable earnings and other traps create a lot of stress on a marriage. If you have a dream of playing poker, play poker first, then get a wife after you have had success. Most women will insist that you get a day job and pursue this gambling thing later, and later will not come.

Am I trying to dissuade you from becoming a professional poker player? Partially, yes. Your goals of having a wife and family are in conflict with most everything about poker. There are some young guys that are playing on-line and have started families with some success. On-line play does make family life a little easier if your wife understands the gambling thing. You might have to change your views regarding on-line play.

If after all of these warnings and criticisms you still want to do it then pursue it with more energy and commitment than you’ve ever expended. It’s the only way you stand a chance. There are sharks out there waiting to take your money, and not all of them carry around a plastic one so you can identify them. Read, read and read some more. If you haven’t read at least 15 books on how to play better poker then you’re not serious.

You seem like a real nice guy, so I didn’t sugar coat anything. I could tell you that everything has been wonderful but it hasn’t. I have lost so much money that it made me physically ill. This is a tough business, if you look at the right people, you can see it in their eyes, and it’s not pretty.

Best of luck.

Gary put him on the spot about the controversy that Hevad’s monkey noises and other antics caused after the ESPN airing of the WSOP. (For example, Pokerati’s own Tom Schneider launched into an editorial about it here.)

Some of Hevad’s comments:

“There was one thing that I did regret, and that was when Ed de Haas told me to act normal. ESPN didn’t show it, but after I called his bluff and sang a song for awhile, I realized how much of a dumb ass I was being… I was so regretful… I was like, ‘I’m really sorry about that, man.’”

In reference to tournaments he’s played since the WSOP: “In my defense, I went to London and Austria, and I was drinking a lot of Red Bull but I wasn’t really crazy… It didn’t match up to the World Series, so I didn’t care.”

To answer Gary’s hypothetical about being faced with Humberto rivering a big pot against Hevad: “I would not have been happy with it. That’s rubbing it in someone’s face. To some people, the way I came across on ESPN, it kinda looked like I was going a little bit over the top… It looked childish and goofy as opposed to offensive…”

“I had a lot of time to reflect after the World Series, and there were times when I was over the top… I look at it different now… I’ve made it, so I can take the game competitively now and be more professional about it.”

While certain parts of the interview certainly show that Hevad is still very young and has a lot to learn about sportsmanship and a career in poker, others demonstrate that he may have learned something about human behavior after watching his performance. Only the future will tell…

Oops.

Tourney Director’s Tip: For the sake of players, dealers, floor staff, and chip counters … limit the total number of chip colors in play at any one time to four (4), and make sure they come from at least three (3) different regions of the rainbow.

We have spelling bees and Scrabble championships on TV and none of the competitors have little “charks” and make munching sounds then yell their name “HUMBERTO, HUMBERTO”. None of them spell a tough word and start making animal sounds while moving their bodies in hunchback dance moves. Could you imagine Humberto as a little kid competing in a spelling bee and yelling his name every time he spelled a word correctly, then getting out a little Power Ranger and acting like he is going to hit the little girl he is competing against?

We as poker players should want nice people with lots of money to come play with us. Do you think when Bill Gates sees Hevad Kahn doing his monkey noises and strange gyrations he says to himself, “boy I want to play with that guy? Maybe I could get that guy to represent Microsoft.” I’m guessing not; however, I guess that’s exactly what Pokerstars says. He is now a face on Pokerstars. Why would any company want to associate with these embarrassing people? Answer, they get a lot of exposure on TV. Michael Vick is getting a ton of exposure, I hear he likes gambling too, and he’s available for about 5-10 years.

Poker is reaching the lowest common denominator, and it’s a joke. I am really tired of people having to exhibit ridiculous behavior in order to get noticed in poker. There was actually a guy at a featured table at the main event who made balloon animals for the other players at the table. Are people really this desperate to get on TV? The answer is clear. Therefore, I have compiled a list of things that I’m willing to do at a featured table next year.

• Bring a large block of ice and chisel an ice sculpture of Norman Chad.
• Recite poetry
• Dress in renaissance clothing and use a turkey leg as a card protector while spouting such phrases as “Oh my damsel, you must taketh the spoils of the pot for you are a most worthy adversary”
• Strap a fake bomb to myself and continue to chant in some middle-eastern bogus language so security is forced to find someone who speaks my language
• Wear no shirt and have on masking tape underwear
• Last but not least, play my best, be nice and have fun.

Is that not enough anymore?

I would love for these idiots not to be shown on TV. Why? There are so many reasons but here are just a few.

These kinds of behaviors encourage others to be more ridiculous, and they must be more over-the-top in order to get attention. That reminds me of the WWF (World Wrestling Federation)

Imagine if all players behaved this way, poker would suck so bad, all decent people would be done. It would take forever to play one round because each player would have to shout their name, do some monkey dance and then hold up their cards to the audience and start singing.

Whether they believe it or not, these people are not entertaining. They are not characters of the game. They are trying way too hard. Characters act themselves which is what makes them unique. These types of people will be remembered as inconsiderate and juvenile. They are irritating, rude and most of all show horrible sportsmanship. Could you imagine Tiger or Phil behaving this way on the golf course? Tiger would not have received all of the wonderful spoils he has gotten without class and composure.

I don’t mind the occasional fist pump on a really important hand; however, most white guys suck at that.

I’m tired of people defending these celebratory idiots. He’s a nice guy away from the table. I keep hearing this. I disagree. It’s like saying besides beating his wife, he’s a great guy. Great guys don’t stomp on someone after a devastating loss. They beat their opponent then shake their hand. I have seen cage fighters kick the shit out of their opponent then go hug them when the match is over.

Let’s get our industry out of the gutter and make poker entertaining because of the cunning, calculating guts that the best players have.

Check out this fun video of Hevad Khan gettin’ jiggy with, er, something:

Thanks, Shuttergypsy, for the link!

ALT HED: Automated Tell Machines?

New episode of Beyond the Table is up. Best poker podcast ever recorded on Day 2 of the 2007 WSOP main event — especially when Tom’s wife (shout out Julie!) gets on the air and screams at all things poker media. Click, and enjoy.

I came home from the WSOP with the plan of rebuilding the portion of my bankroll that was expended in tournament buy-ins over the past two months. I was counting on the super-juicy $40/$80 and $60/$120 limit hold ‘em and mixed games at CA (Casino Arizona) to do the trick. I’m not off to a good start. There is a $1,000 buy-in tournament at CA on August 18, limited to 450 players with a guaranteed $250,000 1st place prize. I am planning on winning, so that just might get me even for the series.

I have always kept perfect records of every session of casino poker I have ever played and whenever I have an especially brutal run, I have found comfort in being able to reflect on the bottom line. As long as I can boot up the spreadsheet and see black ink, I can remind myself that I am a winning player. Individual losses hurt, but it’s one long game.