Unofficial WSOP Women’s Guide to Not Being Disgusting/Obnoxious

by , Jul 10, 2008 | 6:06 pm

Back at the beginning of the WSOP, I called the male species out for their sometimes disgusting/rude behavior. And it’s been a long time coming, but I’m finally ready to call out the females. I know it’s near the end of the WSOP, but there are things that need to be said.

Ladies (I use that term loosely in some cases), let me first thank most of you for not spitting in public or blowing your noses over the trash cans. I’m happy not to have to go there with you. Also, thank you to most of you for being classy and polite.

Then there are the exceptions to the rules. Speaking of rules, here are the primary ones I’ve seen broken during the WSOP.

1. Toilets
For the love of femininity, how is it that so many of you can pee all over the toilet seat? Honestly, if you feel you must hover, improve your aim or wipe the seat when you’re done. And before leaving the stall, take one moment to hit the flush button. I know it’s easy to get lazy and expect that the new-fangled toilets will automatically flush, but a double-check takes two seconds. I’ve seen things left in toilets that I couldn’t shake for days.

2. Boobs
This is a touchy subject. *giggle* The first half of the rule has to do with adjustments. Similar to the “Junk” section of the “Unofficial WSOP Men’s Guide to Not Being Disgusting/Rude,” boob adjustments done in public should be quick and easy. Anything requiring serious snapping or unsnapping of bras or adjusting with both hands under shirts should be done in private. The second half of the boob rule has to do with what’s out there for the world to see. In general, if more of the boobs are exposed than not, you’ve crossed over into exhibitionist territory. Trust me, you can show more than enough cleavage without letting it all slip out.

3. Asses
It’s pretty easy to tell where the ass cheeks end and legs begin. That little extra bit of fabric that covers the entire ass cheek is not only proper but classy. However, if you are a hooker, or even a stripper looking to advertise the business, let it all hang out. Show what you’re sellin’, baby.

That’s all I’ve noticed up to this point. Additions or notes are always welcome!

4 Comments to “Unofficial WSOP Women’s Guide to Not Being Disgusting/Obnoxious”

  1. Poker Shrink

    I note there are three rules for women and sixty-two for men. I guess that is because …. why?

  2. California Jen

    There were four for the men and three for the women.

    Generally, men have more disgusting habits that they are willing to display publicly than women.

  3. DanM

    But isn’t that kinda the thing — at least with the toilets part — women do do their disgusting stuff in private, and the bad ones leave it for you to see?

    BTW, Jen, where do you stand on women sitting at the table with their man? Exception provided for a woman who is looking at cards and trying to study the game … I gotta think this sit quietly-by-your-man practice sets back feminism a good 130 years.

  4. California Jen

    I’m a little undecided on women sitting with their men at the table. If it’s a final table or money bubble – something like that – I don’t care because husbands are just as likely to sweat their wives in that situation as the other way around. But women who just sit all day next to their men who play bugs me because they should go out and do something that they enjoy instead.

    “What did you do today, Sally?”
    “I watched Harry play poker.”
    “What are you doing tomorrow?”
    “Watching Harry play poker.”