What’s happened tonight at the WSOP:

The two final tables for today are both heads-up. First, the $5,000 NL Holdem 6-handed event is down to Joe Commisso and Richard Lyndaker, having played over 130 hands of heads-up action so far. Commisso at one point had a 7-1 chip lead before Lyndaker clawed his way to having his own chip lead. At this time Joe has retaken the lead, but it’s still going to be hard for him to close the deal.

The $1,500 Seven Card Stud Eight or Better tournament is was down to Ryan Hughes and Ron Long. At the moment, Hughes has a 2-1 chip lead, but the chips have been going back and forth quite a bit during heads-up play. Hughes finally defeats Long, taking home the bracelet and $183,000, while Long takes home just over $113,000. This is Hughes’ second bracelet, as he took down the $2,000 Stud Eight or Better event last year. The only other notable name at this final table was 2+2 author David Sklansky, who was the first out at the final table again, finishing in 8th.

Other tournament action on the next page:
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The listeners have spoken, and it’s official:

16 percent of all poker podcast fans prefer Beyond the Table!*

Woot!

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Or download via Door #2 here.

Extra-fun times this week:

• A show about nothing and where Tom puts his fingers.
• Sal the old man loads up his iPod.
• Dan on “What’s Goin’ On?” in the poker world — EPT London, Jose Canseco, and Absolute super-users.
• The BTT gang ventures back to the online felt.
• Monkey noises with Fake Hevad Khan; Fake Humberto Brenes loves Beyond the Table; and Tom goes hip-hop — calls for death in the name of etiquette.
• Karridy calls for more dead presidents on TV, fewer Full Tilt pros.
• No seat for Karridy in a big-little $5/$10 game.
• Bonus monkey noises from Tom.

* Poker podcast poll results

Poker must be the most boring activity in the world. Why else would the industry focus its cameras on the most ridiculous people?

We have spelling bees and Scrabble championships on TV and none of the competitors have little “charks” and make munching sounds then yell their name “HUMBERTO, HUMBERTO”. None of them spell a tough word and start making animal sounds while moving their bodies in hunchback dance moves. Could you imagine Humberto as a little kid competing in a spelling bee and yelling his name every time he spelled a word correctly, then getting out a little Power Ranger and acting like he is going to hit the little girl he is competing against?

We as poker players should want nice people with lots of money to come play with us. Do you think when Bill Gates sees Hevad Kahn doing his monkey noises and strange gyrations he says to himself, “boy I want to play with that guy? Maybe I could get that guy to represent Microsoft.” I’m guessing not; however, I guess that’s exactly what Pokerstars says. He is now a face on Pokerstars. Why would any company want to associate with these embarrassing people? Answer, they get a lot of exposure on TV. Michael Vick is getting a ton of exposure, I hear he likes gambling too, and he’s available for about 5-10 years.

Poker is reaching the lowest common denominator, and it’s a joke. I am really tired of people having to exhibit ridiculous behavior in order to get noticed in poker. There was actually a guy at a featured table at the main event who made balloon animals for the other players at the table. Are people really this desperate to get on TV? The answer is clear. Therefore, I have compiled a list of things that I’m willing to do at a featured table next year.

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One of the criticisms observations about young-punk online phenoms when they play live tourneys is that they don’t know how to compose themselves when not in front of a computer. Like they struggle when it comes to controlling their physical bodies. Of course plenty don’t really give a shit, either.

Check out this fun video of Hevad Khan gettin’ jiggy with, er, something:

Thanks, Shuttergypsy, for the link!

ALT HED: Automated Tell Machines?

A technologically significant poker match is going down right now in Canada — Phil Laak and Ali Eslami vs. Polaris, a supposedly bad-ass poker bot — for $50,000. Here’s an article with more specifics. (Thanks, Venita, for the link!)

This is a scientifically controlled experiment, being played in “duplicate poker” format. Further explanation of this concept here. To learn more and follow the action live, you can do so here.

That’s what Sommer the Batface is doing:

also, don’t imagine you’re following that bot-live-blog, but Ali is absolutely running over the computer in the first 75 hands, thanks to an insane run of cards. He’s up $350 (in limit). Will be fasincating to see if the bot can extract more or less money from Laak with the same cards Ali has gotten so far.

Very cool and interesting. I could see people lining up to try their luck/skill against Polaris. For example, while Laak and Eslami are clearly good players, I wonder how RaiNKhaN would do … you know, since he has been mistaken for a bot and all.

LAS VEGAS–This new batch of freshly legal internet wisehands … not sure what to make of ‘em. It’s kinda hard not to like the savant-ish ability of RaiNKhaN (I think I’m getting the way he does the funky caps right). But there’s a clear leaning toward the WWE as opposed to the PGA that they seem to bring to the table with them.

Hevad “Rain” Khan is currently 4th in chips with 12 players remaining. I know I really do hope he makes the final table — for pure entertainment value and to, you know, yo, represent. But were he to win? Yikes … that would create 10s of thousands of young punks wanting to be like him … and that would be either a really good thing, or a really bad thing.

Here’s the video of RaiNKhaN playing more sit-n-gos than any normal person would know what to do with:

And here’s a “secret” video of one of his tamer outbursts during main event play:

(The comments he’s getting are also rather telling about Gen-Y poker players and what they think matters.)