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The Bally’s System

by , May 25, 2007 | 2:40 pm

Comments (10)

Awesome must-read story that gives some behind-the-scenes insight into how a casino really works.

“We’ve got a system,” Brant said. “Our strategy is to bet against all the customers who come in here. Then we spread our bets around to each and every table and machine in the casino and keep at it for the long haul. We were down about $200 at one of the roulette tables, but were up on everything else, so we came out pretty much ahead. Actually, more than half a million ahead.”

I wonder if The Onion has been credentialed to cover the WSOP.


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10 Comments to “The Bally’s System”


  1. donkey     says:
    May 25th, 2007 at 5:57pm

    I don’t get this story. Does that mean that they took money and someone actually sat down at a table? I don’t get their strategy either. how do you bet against everyone else at a blackjack table?


  2. DanM     says:
    May 25th, 2007 at 6:04pm

    You are kidding, right? You do that by being the dealer.

    By the end of the night, the casino walked away a major winner, up $515,274.

    “I had a sense that we were doing pretty well,” Brant said. “So I checked around with the pit bosses, and it turned out that nearly all the dealers and croupiers were way, way ahead. It was amazing. A night like that only comes along five, six times a week, tops.”


  3. donkey     says:
    May 25th, 2007 at 7:55pm

    No, Dan, I wasn’t kidding. The story is very ambiguous. Naturally, when you play in a casino, you are playing against the house. The house always win, overall, or statistically that should happen. So what makes this casino so different? I’ve never heard of a story where the house is bragging about going up against players and win. If they didn’t, they shouldn’t be around. It almost sounded like they have house players in different games just to go against the grain and ended up winning. Like when they said they were up $33k in slots..wtf…and the most confusing comment “We never gamble more than we can afford to lose. And we try to never lose our heads. We leave that to the customers. We set aside a certain amount to gamble—that’s our kitty—and if we double our money, we only play with our winnings after that.” weird article.


  4. DanM     says:
    May 25th, 2007 at 8:38pm

    you are right. upon second look, i think The Onion’s journalism is questionable at best.


  5. JDC     says:
    May 25th, 2007 at 11:26pm

    You guys know the onion is satire right?


  6. uncle ray     says:
    May 26th, 2007 at 1:19am

    Seriously. No, really, seriously. This is just typical Onion. No second look needed. I thought it was hilarious.

    1) It wasn’t the casino really talking. It was what the casino would be able to say if they were honest about how the business works.

    2) In less words than their long-winded strategy, their strategy is to BE the house. Get it?


  7. SitNGoSteve     says:
    May 26th, 2007 at 2:16am

    “I had a sense that we were doing pretty well,” Brant said. “So I checked around with the pit bosses, and it turned out that nearly all the dealers and croupiers were way, way ahead. It was amazing. A night like that only comes along five, six times a week, tops.”

    “A night like that only comes along five, six times a week, tops”. The Onion rulez.


  8. donkey     says:
    May 26th, 2007 at 3:30pm

    Man, dat article nearly left a tear in my eye…get it? The Onion? Tear in…ahh, never mind.


  9. DanM     says:
    May 26th, 2007 at 5:42pm

    The careful eyes and overall intelligence of Pokerati readers never ceases to amaze me.


  10. Woody     says:
    May 29th, 2007 at 11:09am

    The Onion is genius. Their sports “articles” are classic. They ran one back in January just before the AFC championship about how Peyton Manning was already making plans for his Super Bowl watching party and that he was going to root for Tom Brady to win another one. Quite funny at the time, even though Peyton ended up actually going to the SB this year.