Who Knew I Was So Good at Point-Spreadless Football?

by , Oct 21, 2008 | 1:22 am

Some of you may find this hard to believe, but I’ve never placed a sports bet in a casino. Horse racing, yes … but football, baseball, basketball, soccer … nope. Have come close a few times to betting on Wigan, but in the end decided to just “pretend bet” … and I went on to lose a pretend few hundred dollars. I guess it’s for the same reason I’ve never tried heroin. From what I understand, heroin feels great, but I suppose I fear I’d like it too much and/or would find my new junkie friends far more appealing than anyone I know from poker. But now I am starting to reconsider …

I play in a little free NFL pick’em league with my family each year — hosted online by the Las Vegas Review Journal with 7-Eleven gift certificates and Fatheads for prizes — and this year, seven weeks into the season, I’m kinda kicking butt.

Having correctly picked 71 of 102 winners, I’m in the top 1 percent: 21st out of 9,379 in Las Vegas, and 155th out of 131,525 nationwide.

Among the 13 people in the Michalski group, I am in first place. While I’m proud of that, you should realize that competition includes my 1-year-old nephew who always picks teams named after animals, Uncle Ray who writes in “Ditka” for every pick, and my cousin-in-law Phil the Filmmaker:

There’s also a cool little “Survivor” sidegame, where you have to pick one team that will be a certain winner each week — you get to use each team once. I’m still alive in that, too … 400 of us are in LV, and about 3,400 nationwide. I think winning that comes with some real prizes actually … man, if/when I go out in that, I know I’ll be feeling some serious withdrawal.

OK, sorry, back to poker …

8 Comments to “Who Knew I Was So Good at Point-Spreadless Football?”

  1. donkey

    No joke, man, you have a gift. People are paid big money for picking money line. I wouldn’t be surprised if a handicapping service bid on your services. You know what they say “Know what you know, and know what you don’t know. And know that I gotta know everything you know as soon as you know it… or sooner”

  2. DanM

    I feel like you’re mocking me, donk. Let’s see how I do this upcoming week. It’s always scary to go onto any field of play shortly after declaring your greatness.

  3. donkey

    Naw, we proud of you Dan. You’re in the 1% elite, baby! Keep it up! Love to see how you do week-to-week.

  4. DanM

    ***the 1% elite***

    haven’t been there since 3rd-grade spelling.

  5. Uncle Ray

    Ditka? Ditka? Just ’cause you think the Cowboys will win whenever Aikman is in the broadcast booth doesn’t mean we ALL live in the past. On the other hand, Chuckie in our group DOES think that way.

    But on a positive note, this is one of your best POKER articles yet. And Tom, if you don’t hear how well Dan is doing in upcoming weeks, check back here. I’ll keep you posted.

  6. Uncle Ray

    I’ll keep you posted because if Dan doesn’t tell you, you know he tumbled.

    If he keeps it up, his new nickname will be Tampa Bay Danrays. He will have gone from worst every previous year to first. (That’s almost but not quite true. Usually I’m last/worst.)

  7. DanM

    Yeah, I seem to recall hanging close to Phil the Filmmaker last year. But maybe I’m just imagining what I had hoped to happen.

  8. DanM

    We knew it was going to happen …

    Not sure how I ranked nationally, but in the Michalski family group, I got 13th out of 13 this week. So far have picked 5 games correct out of 13. My 1-year-old nephew who goes for animal team names has gotten 11 so far.

    I did win my survivor pick, though — just barely, with Tennessee in overtime.